Dancing with the Stars 6’s first Results Show was light on surprises — which, this early in the competition, is probably a good thing.
Perhaps the most unexpected moment came early in the show when the judges awarded their encore to Jason Taylor & Edyta Sliwinska for their Mambo, instead of to Kristi Yamaguchi & Mark Ballas, who earned the highest total score over two weeks.
The voting results for all the men were announced before any of the women’s results, and Steve Guttenberg & Anna Trebunskaya were the first couple told that they’d be moving on to next week.
Before any other results were revealed, teenage heartthrobs the Jonas Brothers performed a cover of A-Ha’s hit, "Take on Me." They were joined on the floor by DwtS pros Anna, Edyta, Tony, and Jonathan.
After the musical interlude, Samantha Harris interviewed all of the male competitors. They all expressed happiness that "The Gutte" was safe because, as Jason put it, "He just loves life."
The Gutte was then joined by Jason & Edyta, Mario & Karina Smirnoff, and Adam Carolla & Julianne Hough, who learned they’d be moving on to Week 3 as well.
That left Penn Jillette & Kym Johnson and Cristian de la Fuente & Cheryl Burke to await their fates, although Tom Bergeron noted that they weren’t necessarily the two lowest scoring couples. Penn & Kym were told to hit the road, and Penn said that he and Kym would perform next week in the parking lot.
With the men’s voting results announced, it was time to find out which of the female celebrities would move on to next week. Shannon Elizabeth & Derek Hough were the first couple to get the good news.
In a special pre-taped segment, Cameron Mathison donned his Superman outfit from last season and interviewed folks on the streets of New York City about the current season’s contestants. Some poor guy will forever be teased by his friends for telling Cameron he’s rooting for "Monica Guchi." Then again, the guy’s friends may not want to admit they watch DwtS. The bit wasn’t as good as Dance Center, but it wasn’t as bad as Jimmy Kimmel & Guillermo.
Two more performances stood between viewers and the results. Jacques Heim choreographed a Cirque du Soleil-style routine that combined aerial acrobatics with dancing.
And the Jonas Brothers returned to perform "When You Look Me in the Eyes," accompanied by DwtS pros Cheryl and Louis.
Following those performances, Samantha interviewed the Hough siblings and their respective partners. Adam commandeered the interview, first suggesting that the good-looking Houghs be bred in a lab. And when Julianne rhetorically asked, "Who paired us together?" Adam replied, "God did," and looked skyward.
Finally, Marlee Matlin & Fabian Sanchez, Kristi & Mark, and Priscilla Presley & Louis van Amstel learned that they were safe as well. Tom mentioned again that the two remaining pairs — Monica Seles & Jonathan Roberts and Marissa Jaret Winokur & Tony Dovolani — weren’t necessarily the two lowest vote-getters among the women.
Monica & Jonathan were then told that they were out. Despite leaving so soon, Monica said she’s learned to love dancing and plans to keep it up.
Every season, the outro songs are notoriously cruel, but tonight’s song seemed especially so. Sheryl Crow’s "The First Cut Is the Deepest" would’ve been a fine choice, if it weren’t for the fact that Monica was once stabbed in the back during a tennis match by a deranged fan.