Monthly Archives: July 2006

Week 5: Reality Episode

Zayra was as surprised as the rest of us when she survived another elimination on last week’s Rock Star.
So how does she plan to reward Supernova’s faith in her at this week’s
performance show? By turning the poppiest 80’s hit of them all,
“867-5309,” into a punk rock song.

After Phil’s elimination, the
wannabe rock stars raised a glass to him. According to their comments,
Phil was much cooler than he came off onstage. Zayra admitted that, if
the band had voted according to their personal taste — and not based
on who they thought wanted to be in the band more — she probably
would’ve been out.

Later, all of the men hung out in the
billiard room bemoaning the fact that fewer men than women now remain,
and vowing to show the women just who wears the leather pants in the
mansion. Married guy Magni wisely kept his mouth shut during the
discussion.

Magni’s wife sent him a video from home. Since he
left Iceland for California, their infant son has learned to walk.
Tearfully, Magni said the video was the fuel he needed to keep
competing.

The next day, Jason Newsted stopped by the mansion to
coach the rockers on the finer points of performing. As a group, they
watched videos of last week’s performances, much to the dismay of
several contestants.

Patrice knew that “Remedy” was not her
finest work and was eager to prove herself this week. Dilana felt that
her vocals on “Time After Time” were terrible and actually cried,
despite rave reviews from her competitors.

Jill took the
harshest criticism from Jason, and several of the rockers laughed at
the footage of Gilby running away from her during their performance of
“Brown Sugar.” As a defense mechanism, Jill wouldn’t stop talking and
rationalizing. Tired of listening, Lukas and Toby played a game of
tic-tac-toe.

Lukas was the first person to find the new batch of
songs the following day, and he immediately took all of the sheets off
of the wall and brought them out by the pool. Not having to stand in
front of the wall and negotiate relaxed everyone, making song selection
an easy process.

Josh initially wanted to sing “Higher Ground”
by Stevie Wonder, until he realized that Tommy Lee would be playing
drums for the song. Josh assumed that Tommy would want to do, in his
words a “Hot Red Chili Peppers-style” (sic) version of the song, and he
gave the song to Patrice.

As Patrice walked around the house
after song selection, Ryan asked how she felt about performing with a
rock legend. A tense Patrice told Ryan to quit saying Tommy Lee’s name
in her presence. Always eager to fight, Ryan told Patrice that this was
the first and only time he’d uttered Tommy’s name. Patrice backed off,
but Ryan still walked away shaking his head and muttering “bitch” under
his breath.

House Band rehearsal showed a few of what should be
the more disastrous performances tomorrow night. Ignoring Supernova’s
advice to bring the rock, Josh chose the ska song “Santeria” by
Sublime. To make it as un-rocking as possible, he supplied his own beat
box effects. If only it were Rock Star: The Fat Boys. Not only would Josh make the band, he’d have a sweet role in Disorderlies 2.

Zayra,
likewise ignoring the advice to rock, chose “867-5309 (Jenny)” by Tommy
Tutone. As if following a Blondie tune with another 80s hit wasn’t bad
enough, she insisted on changing the song’s rhythm to make it more punk
rock. Band leader Paul said, “Zayra has taken everything that was cool
about the song and gotten rid of it.”

Guitarist Jim suggested
that it would show more of her skills if she would just perform a song
straight for once instead of always rearranging things. She insisted
that a straight performance wasn’t her style, and the band caved to
Zayra’s demands — content to play the song her silly way, so long as
they were also free to giggle.

DwtS Offseason Update: 7-28-06

DWTS at the Emmys
Dancing with the Stars faces off against stiff competition in the Outstanding Reality-Competition Program category at the 58th annual Primetime Emmy Awards. The other nominees are Project Runway, Survivor, American Idol, and The Amazing Race.

Half of the nominees for the Choreography award are dances from DWTS.
Tony Dovolani earned a nomination for his Jive to “Wake Me Up Before
You Go, Go,” and Cheryl Burke earned nominations for her “Thriller”
Paso Doble and her “Save a Horse” freestyle routine.

Cheryl talked about her Emmy nominations with the Philippine News. The awards ceremony will air Sunday, August 27 at 8/7c on NBC.

Another Emmy Nominee Speaks
Nick Kosovich, nominated as co-choreographer with Cheryl for the “Thriller” routine, said in an interview with NYUSABDA that part of being Tatum O’Neal’s partner was attending AA meetings with her! Nick also confirmed that he’ll be returning for Season 3. (Thanks to Raphael Pungin for posting a link to the interview.)

Third Pro Confirmed
Maksim Chmerkovskiy will be joining Cheryl and Nick for another season of DWTS. Apparently, producers wanted to add Max’s brother Valentin to the cast of pros, but Val’s schedule would not permit it.

Week 4: Elimination Show

Space case Zayra seemed like the obvious choice for elimination on this week’s Rock Star. Even she thought so. And Supernova admitted that they can’t really see her fronting their band. But the band shocked everyone when they sent wobbly-headed Phil home.

After Brooke narrated a brief montage of clips from last night’s show, Tommy again praised Storm for her stage dive. Patrice defended her boring performance, saying that she was aiming for consistency.

Dave asked Zayra where she got her performance show space suit, and she said she stole it from his wardrobe. Gilby told Zayra to pick a really heavy rock song next week and avoid any pop numbers.

Phil tried to blame his lousy performance on a weak set of songs to choose from, but Dave pointed to Dana and Dilana for having given strong, stripped down performances.

During footage filmed at the mansion after the performance show, Jill still didn’t understand why Gilby was uncomfortable with her dry humping him. Dana was pumped about her performance, but Dilana and Ryan said it wasn’t Supernova’s job to teach her how to be a rocker. She protested against her good girl image: “I’ve worn combat boots. I’ve worn a denim skirt.”

Back in the concert hall, Gilby went after Jill again for not absorbing his advice, learned through years of experience. “I played with Heart. Ann Wilson never had to stoop so low as to hump me to get her emotions out.” Nancy Wilson, however… total slut.

Gilby also said that the hyper-sexualized female rocker is the kind of cliched thing that you see at a Holiday Inn. Still not willing to accept any blame, Jill said, “but everything’s been done in rock n’ roll.” The band did not appreciate that comment, and Gilby wondered if everything would end in an argument if Jill was a member of their band.

Dana said that she was tired of being picked on, and that she was learning more from her housemates when they kept their mouths’ shut. Dilana, who’s made several efforts to help Dana, looked hurt.

The encore went to Storm, as predicted. When she lets go, she’s a lot of fun to watch — showing that you don’t have to do a Rolling Stones song to channel your inner Mick Jagger. Even the perpetually scowling Lukas smiled during the encore.

The early bottom three, Zayra, Jill, and Josh, were joined at some point during the voting by Phil and Patrice. The final members of the bottom three were as follows:

Patrice – “My Iron Lung” by Radiohead
The guys in the band liked the song choice, which meant Patrice would survive the cut no matter how she performed. But she seemed really comfortable on stage, and she even ventured into the crowd. Hopefully she’ll pay attention to how badly Jill’s combative attitude was perceived by the band and be a little more gracious next week if she gets criticized.

Zayra – “I’m Not an Addict” by K’s Choice
Zayra stuck with her outer space wardrobe, wearing a silver mini-kimono. She toned down her stage antics, and was accompanied only by Raphael on electric guitar. Zayra often has trouble with her diction, and she has moments that make you think she’s completely tone deaf. But then, when she gets the chance to pick her own material, she has moments of such power and beauty that I get chills. She’s not right for this band, but Zayra could do great — or terrible — things on her own.

Phil – “Smoking Umbrellas” by Failure
Phil was totally stunned to be in the bottom three. He should take it as a clue that his head bobbing turns people off. I’m not familiar with this song, but if the way he sang it was how it was supposed to sound, it was a bad choice. It just sounded like he was singing off-key the whole time. Although he couldn’t entirely keep his head from bobbling around, he did give an energetic performance.

All three of the performances were pretty good, so it came down to who the band thought was most committed to Supernova. They felt that Phil wanted to win the show more than he actually wanted to be a member of Supernova. Absolutely every one of the rockers, including Zayra, looked stunned that Phil was cut instead of Zayra.

After the show, Patrice said that Phil’s elimination was a wake-up call for the rest of the contestants. Rockers who thought they’d come on the show just to promote themselves better keep their bags packed.

Week 4: Performance Show

This week’s Rock Star: Supernova performance show had a bit of
everything. Storm blew everyone away with a song nobody had ever heard
of. Dilana became Dilauper. Josh and Patrice treated us to their
special brand of soulless white soul. Dana came off as a little
unhinged, which worked for her. Live made Ryan come alive. Jill’s
onstage antics with Gilby drove him to file a sexual harrassment suit
against her. And Zayra wore her planet’s equivalent of the little black
dress: a shiny, blue, rubber jumpsuit.

The show opened with a
clip from the reality episode, which showed the contestants hearing a
medley of Supernova tracks. After the clip, Gilby said he was excited that Supernova
had gotten to share some of their music with the contestants, who now
have a better idea of what kind of music the winner will be singing. Then it was on to the night’s performances.

Lukas – “Bittersweet Symphony” by The Verve
Lukas
belted out the song with his signature growl, and this week, he
strapped on a guitar — though it was more prop than instrument. Tommy
said the version was heavy, but it sounded like the original to me.
Jason still wishes Lukas would “open up” his throat when he sings.

Zayra – “Call Me” by Blondie
It
was hard to listen to Zayra and not be distracted by her skin-tight
space majorette outfit. Once she warmed up, her vocals were pretty good
— for Zayra. As bad as she is, she has improved each week. Dave, in an
attempt to encourage her, I think, told her to get started on her solo
career right now.

While Zayra is a pretty girl, every time
Brooke stands next to her, all of Zayra’s flaws are magnified. If I was
her, I’d fight to make sure I was never the last performer before a
commercial break.

Dana – “About a Girl” by Nirvana
Dana
went acoustic for this song, the second performer of the night to wield
a guitar. She finally figured out how to make her voice sound gritty.
Dave was complimentary: “You are finally looking damaged enough to be a
rock singer. There’s nothing worse than a… well-balanced rock singer.”

Patrice – “Remedy” by the Black Crowes
Patrice
performed with all of the enthusiasm of someone who’s been performing
the same set of covers in Vegas for 20 years. Dave said, “I’m getting
bored,” and encouraged her to change up her performance a bit. When
Patrice asked Dave if he follows his own advice, he responded that he
already has a job; she doesn’t.

Toby – “White Wedding” by Billy Idol
This
song is great raw material for a talented singer. Toby did the song
justice. He’s starting to really look like he could front a heavy band,
interacting with the crowd and the House Band. Jason said that this was
his favorite performance from Toby thus far.

Magni – “Heroes” by David Bowie
Yet
another guitar-playing contestant. The band wanted more energy from
him, but admitted that his vocals were flawless. Magni defended his
choice to stand relatively still behind the mic stand as the best way
to pay tribute to an amazing song.

Ryan – “I Alone” by Live
Ryan
was criticized last week for looking like he wasn’t having any fun on
stage. So this week, he came out angrier, yet looser, than ever, and it
totally worked. The band was impressed.

Jill – “Brown Sugar” by the Rolling Stones
Jill
couldn’t stop grinding on guest guitarist Gilby, and he called her out for it. He said
that, when women in rock resort to overt sexuality, “it’s cheap and
it’s weak.” Newly single Dave said, “If it was my band, we’d be
grinding for hours on end.”

Phil – “One Headlight” by The Wallflowers
Phil’s
spastic head movements are still his biggest problem, and even Tommy
worried that people might not be able to watch 90 minutes of Phil’s
bobble-headedness. I get motion sick after watching him for two
minutes. If he ever becomes famous, someone will make an immobile-head doll in his likeness.

Dilana – “Time After Time” by Cyndi Lauper
Dilana
sat for this one, accompanied only by Jim on guitar, and drew the whole
audience into her performance. She sounded wonderful whispering the
verses of the song, and then stood up and transformed into typical Dilana during the
chorus, making the offer to “catch you” sound more like a threat. As
the band praised her, she graciously brought Jim back out for a bow.

Josh – “No Rain” by Blind Melon
It was a flat, passionless performance that left Jason shaking his head. If Josh winds up in the bottom three again, he’s dead meat.

Storm -“Anything, Anything” by Dramarama
Storm
was the only contestant who even knew this not-quite-a-hit from the
mid-’80s, but there was no way anyone could’ve performed this better
than she did. Near the end of the song, Storm chucked the mic in the
air and dove into the crowd. She’ll be getting the
encore tomorrow night.

Early Bottom 3:
Josh
Jill
Zayra

Of
the other contestants, Phil and Patrice are the most likely candidates
to dip into the bottom three at some point during the voting.

My
vote went to Storm. She finally showed what she was capable of, and her
skimpy, but not slutty, outfit showed how ripped she is.

Week 4: Reality Episode

Last season’s songwriting clinic produced tragic results for the eardrums of Rock Star: INXS fans. Mercifully, Supernova
contestants wrote songs significantly better than the Ty Taylor
debacle, “Stop Go.” However, my two-year-old niece also writes songs
better than “Stop Go,” and she’s stealing lines from the Wiggles.

The
day after Jenny’s elimination, Gilby Clarke informed the contestants
about the songwriting clinic. They’d be split into three teams, and
each team would come up with lyrics and a melody to accompany a track
otherwise written and performed by Supernova.

Dilana, Toby, and
Magni, the winners of the first three encores, were named team
captains. The captains picked their teams, with Lukas being chosen
first overall. Pop princess Dana was left for last.

Dilana’s
all-star team of Lukas, Ryan, and Storm listened to the track and got
right to work, banging out the chorus in a matter of minutes. But their
progress was stymied when Lukas lost focus and left the room in a
futile search for beer.

Toby, Phil, Patrice, and Zayra were
making progress until Patrice accidentally erased their copy of the
track. But by then they’d already settled on what they thought was the
key to their success — singing through a megaphone. It worked for J.D.
last season.

The only team with a chemistry problem was Magni’s
crew. Jill started to suggest lyrics immediately, while Magni insisted
that they listen to the track a few times first. When she said that
wasn’t the way she liked to work, Magni responded, “I honestly don’t
give a rat’s ass.”

Josh played peacemaker, going after Jill when
she left the room. But it was Dana’s ideas for the chorus that finally
got them working together as a group. Magni correctly guessed that he
was the only one who’d actually written with a band before.

The
members of Supernova dropped by the house the next day to listen to the
teams’ songs. Tommy Lee was most impressed by Dilana’s team after they
performed their rocking melody. Toby’s team created a more eclectic
sound that the Supernova described as “quirky” (rarely a
compliment–Crispin Glover is also “quirky”) but “entertaining.” And
Magni’s group produced the best harmonies, and the band appreciated
their gospel-like sound.

The clinic was not a true contest, so
there were no winners. And the only prize for participating seemed to
be a few clues as to what direction the band planned to take. Tommy
said the band would be veering away from bluesy sounds. Supernova
played some of their other tracks for the contestants, and the music
sounded poppier than anything the members had played in previous clips.

At
song selection the next day, contestants found a note from Gilby which
stated that he’d be playing guitar on “Brown Sugar” by the Rolling
Stones. After some deliberation, it was decided that Jill would perform
with Gilby.

Whenever Rock Star contestants want to show
their tough side, it seems they sing a Nirvana song. This week, Dana
fought for the Nirvana song, “About a Girl.” The rest of the girls
fought for Blondie’s “Call Me.” Zayra was able to persuade the others
that it was her only way to stay out of the bottom 3.

The only
rehearsal footage shown was of Jill with Gilby and the House Band. When
Jill suggested changing the song’s key to something better for her
voice, Gilby joked with her, “You singers kill us.” Almost inevitably,
a key change makes the singer sound better and the guitars sound worse.
But, since the show is about singers, Gilby sucked it up and consented
to the change.

Week 3: Elimination Show

Three of the shows least rockin’ performers landed in the bottom three of the latest Rock Star: Supernova. Josh and Dana fought to
stay on the show, while Jenny seemed resigned to elimination. The band
rewarded her unenthusiastic effort by sending her home.

At the
mansion after last night’s performance show, Dana complained that the
Supernovans were picking on her, and she asked the other women what she
was doing wrong. Dilana told her to get dirty, “open your legs”
onstage, and don’t worry about being pretty. Alongside Storm and
Dilana, Dana watched a video of her “It’s My Life” performance. Dana
admitted that she finally saw why the band had been tough on her.

In
another room, Ryan, Toby and Lukas also watched Dana’s video. They
weren’t impressed. Ryan said that Dana was good but didn’t belong on
this particular show.

At the elimination show, Dana asked Ryan
why he hadn’t said that to her face. He responded that he had told her
not to sing the Bon Jovi song, but that she ignored him.

After
Ryan and Dana sorted out their differences, the band asked Magni to
give an encore performance of STP’s “Plush.” His gigantic glasses also
showed up for the encore.

Host Brooke reminded viewers that
Dana, Jenny, and Ryan were the performance show’s early low-vote
getters. As the evening of the performance show wore on, Josh and Zayra
also spent time at the bottom. As always, the final bottom three was
revealed one at a time, just before each performed.

Jenny – “Vasoline” by Stone Temple Pilots
With
her skull belt buckle and knee high socks, Jenny looked a lot like
Avril Lavigne. Unfortunately, producer Butch wasn’t around to
appreciate it. Jenny took the stage with slumped shoulders, as if she
expected to be eliminated. Jenny jumped around and tried to rock, but
the song didn’t suit her, and Supernova scowled during the entire
performance — not a good sign.

Dana – “High Road Easy” by Sass Jordan
This
was obviously not the first time she’d performed this song, and she was
much more comfortable than she had been during any previous
perfomrance. Dana really saved herself by choosing a song she knew she
could rock. Her voice was on, and her confidence boosted her stage
presence.

Josh – “Heart-Shaped Box” by Nirvana
The
vocal coach totally messed with Josh’s head by telling him not to move
his jaw from side to side. He’s stopped opening his mouth at all, and
has been singing with his teeth clenched. He did his best Kurt Cobain
impression during this song, which should send the band the message
that Josh can sing soul or karaoke, and nothing in between.

After
the performances, Tommy called himself “Hatchet Man” and hemmed and
hawed and whined that eliminating people sucks — exactly like he did
in the previous elimination shows. This week, he mixed in some Jaws
sound effects, making the elimination process even more drawn out and
uncomfortable than it needed to be.

Dana was told she was safe. And then Jenny was given the boot. Tommy told her, “You just didn’t cut it, baby. It’s okay.”

Jenny
was gracious in defeat and said that the show taught her not to always
make safe choices. She felt that being a part of the process “was the
best slap in the face” she’d ever gotten.

Week 3: Performance Show

On this week’s Rock Star: Supernova performance show, Dilana,
Lukas, and Magni continued to cruise. A Runaway Train derailed Toby a
bit. And Zayra turned a sickening, saccharine R.E.M. song into
something that was (Am I really typing this?) pretty good!

Patrice – “Helter Skelter” by The Beatles
Patrice’s
affected Texas twang spilled through into the song, which at least
distracted me from her highlights. She sang fine, but she’s just not my
kind of performer. I can’t shake the suspicion that she’d come off
better in intimate clubs than she does over the airwaves.

Josh – “Come As You Are” by Nirvana
For
some reason, Josh thought that an acoustic rendition of the song would
show his edgy side. By singing out of one side of his pinched mouth, he
sounded just like Tracy Chapman. The members of Supernova were not
impressed.

The problem with Josh is his desire to be the next
White Guy With Soul. There’s a long tradition of wanna-be-soulful white
guys: The Blues Brothers, Michael McDonald, Steve Winwood, Rick Astley,
and last season’s Ty Taylor. Unfortunately, America recently crowned
its newest White Guy With Soul when Taylor Hicks won American Idol. You’re a few months too late, Josh.

Storm – “Just What I Needed” by The Cars
Storm
still couldn’t get the Broadway out of her voice. This tendency will
probably put her out of the running for the job. Tommy’s performance
advice for Storm was that she should wear less clothing, because he’d
like to see more of her. Tommy’s compulsive need to remind everyone
that he is VERY HETEROSEXUAL is almost as grating as Tom Cruise’s. At
least Cruise has been in hiding lately, while he pretends to be a
father.

Lukas – “Let’s Spend the Night Together” by The Rolling Stones
Lukas
didn’t heed any of the voice coach’s advice about not singing from the
throat. But he does have charisma for a guy with skunk hair. And Gilby
liked the goth arrangement after all.

Jill – “All Right Now” by Free
Jill
wore some unfortunate porn star lipstick, but did an admirable job with
a song that has always lacked a certain punch for me. After her second
strong performance in a row — last week’s elimination show and tonight
— Gilby said, “Finally, I can imagine us behind you.” In his mind,
Tommy pumped his fist and said, “You got that right. She’s like a tiny
Pam.”

Ryan – “Fortunate Son” by Creedence Clearwater Revival
Yeeeaaaahhhh,
man! CCR! Too bad Ryan was totally bland. Gilby said Ryan didn’t look
like he was having any fun while he was performing. Ryan responded that
it was time to clear up the misconception that he never smiled. He
lowered his mic, looked at the camera, and smiled for ten seconds.
Funny, but probably not enough to keep him out of the bottom three.

Phil – “White Rabbit” by Jefferson Airplane
Jason
joined Phil on stage to play bass for the song, where Phil got in the
way of a Newsted head bang and received a split lip. This was Phil’s
best performance so far, but that’s not saying much.

Dana – “It’s My Life” by Bon Jovi
Dana
has consistently given off the vibe that she’d be the most rocking
counselor at a Baptist summer camp. She needs to go home, and I think
she will. Soon.

Toby – “Runaway Train” by Soul Asylum
Another lame song, and it zapped Toby of his cool Toby powers. Dave took a nap during the song, and I wanted to do the same.

Magni – “Plush” by Stone Temple Pilots
With
his hideous oversized sunglasses, Magni was trying to be either
Icelandic Bono (“Feed the hungry!”) or Icelandic Elderly Man (“Look
out, Farmer’s Market!”). This is kind of a dumb song too, but Magni has
magnetism. And tight jeans. I think I saw mini-Magni. (His Magni-toe?)

Zayra – “Everybody Hurts” by R.E.M.
Her
arrangement turned this into an Enya song, but, for the first time, her
La Vida Bjorka voice sounded pretty good. At the end of the
performance, she let out some screams that actually gave me goosebumps.
In a good way, even.

Jenny – “Drive” by Incubus
Jenny
performed a jangly, hippie-girl, indie-pop version of this song that
Gilby said was too Lillith Fair, and not enough OzzFest. I like Jenny,
just not as a member of this band. Get her on a double bill with Suzie
McNeil, and I’m there.

Dilana – “Zombie” by The Cranberries
Supernova
probably wishes they could boot everyone else right now and just pick
Dilana. She has a cool voice and great stage presence. She’s a Hot
Topic Stevie Nicks. Even the lighting crew went over the top for her.

It
seems like Dilana’s got this thing in the bag. But don’t forget that,
at this time last season, it seemed like there was no way that Jordis
could lose. It’s too early to hand the job to Dilana, even though she’s
got a significant edge on the competition.

Best Performances:
Dilana
Lukas
Magni

Worst Performances:
Josh
Dana
Ryan

Early Bottom Three:
Jenny
Dana
Ryan

I
wouldn’t be surprised if the early bottom three sticks as the final
bottom three. My vote went to Magni. His experience and confidence will
help him to improve each week, hopefully peaking when he’s in the final
three.

Week 3: Reality Episode

Fears of picking the wrong song have turned the contestants on Rock Star: Supernova into a bunch of desperados. Suddenly, Lukas isn’t the only villain living in the Hotel California.

Of
course, Lukas had to start this week’s reality episode by blurting out
something he shouldn’t have. As the rockers raised a toast to the
ousted Chris, Lukas said that, were he in Supernova, he would’ve
eliminated someone else.

The band’s only other two elimination
options this past week, Zayra and Jill, didn’t appreciate Lukas’s
statement. Jill asked a question wondered by many: “Why can’t he just
keep his mouth shut?”

Lukas finally did just that the next day,
at the rockers’ first clinic. While waiting for his turn to sing in
front of vocal coach Liz Lewis, he fidgeted nervously and quietly with
his beard.

Reluctantly, he snarled the Heart song “What About
Love,” and Liz told him exactly what Jason Newsted did last week: Lukas
is ruining his vocal chords. Coming from a professional voice coach,
rather than a has-been bassist, Lukas seemed to take her warnings more
seriously.

Dilana emerged from the clinic as the singer with
perhaps the greatest potential. She started her lesson insisting that
her range was limited. But when Liz forced her to sing in a higher key,
Dilana was delighted to hear that her voice sounded stronger and more
beautiful when she wasn’t growling.

The following day,
friendships were tested during this week’s song selection. Josh was the
first to spot the posted songs, and he decided on his favorite before
telling the others that the songs were up.

When everyone entered
the room, Toby said that he’d keep a tally of who was interested in
each song. But Josh declared that he’d be taking “Come As You Are” by
Nirvana. When Dana — probably the only contestant who would do a worse
job with the song –tried to negotiate with him, Josh sat on the sheet
music.

Following Josh’s lead, and ignoring Toby’s requests that
everyone adhere to his list system, Patrice grabbed the music for
“Helter Skelter” by The Beatles. Jill, who’d been deciding between that
song and a few others, confronted Patrice about her aggressive act.

As
they argued, Patrice played both aggressor and victim. First, she held
up a finger and asked Jill, “Were you passionate about it?” as if her
desire for the song gave her more leverage to pick it over any other
contestant. Then, after going on the attack, Patrice informed Jill that
her perception of events was simply a misinterpretation.

Jill
said that their conflict wasn’t about the song but Patrice’s refusal to
negotiate. Jill said, “I don’t need to do it [the song].”

Interpreting the comment as a dig, Patrice shot back, “Don’t think I need to do it, ’cause you know I don’t.”

As Patrice walked away, Jill yelled, “Maybe you do. That’s why you’re so ‘passionate’ about it.”

In
rehearsal with the House Band, Zayra came up with a goofy arrangement
for her song, “Everybody Hurts” by R.E.M. As she described what she
wanted, Jim the guitarist said, “What you’re describing sounds like an
orchestra.”

Zayra casually replied, “That’s fine.”

Jim pointed out the obvious: “We’re not an orchestra.”

Things
didn’t go much better for the band during their rehearsal with Lukas.
He tried to improve “Let’s Spend the Night Together” by the Rolling
Stones by adding some Marilyn Manson-type loop effects to it.

The
Band members all shrugged an went along with it, but keyboard player
Paul predicted a bad outcome for Lukas on performance night.
Apparently, Gilby Clarke is a huge Rolling Stones fan and won’t
appreciate the way Lukas tampered with one of that band’s classics.

Week 2: Elimination Show

Somehow, the tone-deaf, vocally-challenged, combative Zayra survived this week’s elimination episode of Rock Star: Supernova.
Maybe the band likes her chutzpah. Maybe the producers think
she makes for good car-wreck TV (I agree). Or maybe it was because it was her
first trip to the bottom three. Whatever the reason, bland Southerner
Chris — in the bottom three for the second week in a row, despite his
awesome perm — got the old heave ho.

The episode began with
footage from the mansion, which was filmed immediately after the
performance show ended. Lukas, Chris, and Jill were defensive about the
negative comments they’d received from the band. However, Toby reminded
them that it was in their own best interests to act on Supernova’s
advice, since they are the ones who will ultimately choose the winner.

When
asked about the footage and their comments from the performance show,
nearly every contestant was conciliatory, if not obsequious. But Zayra
wouldn’t back down from her statement that the guys in Supernova had
their heydays when she was still an infant.

Gilby asked Zayra if
she felt it was important to be familiar with the Supernovans past
albums. Zayra explained, “I am familiar, but you asked if I owned
anything.” She elaborated that, growing up in Puerto Rico, she couldn’t
afford to buy whole albums. She was only able to afford 45RPM record
singles. Gilby nodded and smiled with the smug satisfaction that comes
only from knowing you once amassed a huge fortune by taking every last
dime of disposable income from the pockets of young Puerto Rican girls.
I know that smile; I’ve worn it myself.

Toby gave an encore
performance of “Somebody Told Me” that was just as good as the night
before. Then it was time to announce which performers landed in the
bottom three.

Jenny was the only other person to spend time at
the bottom besides the three singers — Zayra, Chris, and Jill —
mentioned as the early bottom-feeders at the end of last night’s
performance show. Eventually, Jenny’s vote totals went back up, and the
original bottom three became the final bottom three.

Jill – “Bring Me To Life” by Evanescence
It
was smart to do a song that Zayra butchered last week. Jill did a much
better job with it, and Zayra didn’t look amused during the
performance. This is the Jill we’ve waited to see. She set the bar
super high for Zayra and Chris.

Zayra – “You Really Got Me” by The Kinks
She
liked her own arrangement so much, Zayra decided she wanted a chance to
improve on her first performance. She actually did do a better job, not
that it could’ve been much worse. She added a few hysterical screams
that managed to stay in key, and she added some spastic upper body
movements as well. She showed that she might have the potential to be
more of a performance artist than even Dilana.

Chris – “If You Could Only See” by Tonic
If
this was authentic Chris, I think I want inauthentic Chris back. His
eyes were squinting and reopening out of sync with one another, and his
mouth looked like a hole punched through a piece of sad, wet clay; his
face looked like it was melting. But he actually did a decent job
singing. It was the best we’d heard from Chris, so at least he got to
end on a high note.

After deliberating with his bandmates, Gilby
commended Jill on her voice, Zayra on her performance, and Chris on his
willingness to act on their comments. After a brief pause, Tommy told
Jill what the rest of us already knew. She was safe this week.

Despite
Chris’s efforts to change in order to please Supernova, Tommy told
Chris that he “didn’t cut it” and was the second rocker eliminated.
Zayra returned to the other contestants and celebrated by sitting in
Phil’s lap and lying on Magni.

Dave told Chris that tonight’s
performance was his best, and each of the guys made a point of
encouraging Chris. But like the band said, Zayra does put on a heck of
a show. That was reason enough to keep her around for another week.