Week 3: Performance Show

On this week’s Rock Star: Supernova performance show, Dilana,
Lukas, and Magni continued to cruise. A Runaway Train derailed Toby a
bit. And Zayra turned a sickening, saccharine R.E.M. song into
something that was (Am I really typing this?) pretty good!

Patrice – “Helter Skelter” by The Beatles
Patrice’s
affected Texas twang spilled through into the song, which at least
distracted me from her highlights. She sang fine, but she’s just not my
kind of performer. I can’t shake the suspicion that she’d come off
better in intimate clubs than she does over the airwaves.

Josh – “Come As You Are” by Nirvana
For
some reason, Josh thought that an acoustic rendition of the song would
show his edgy side. By singing out of one side of his pinched mouth, he
sounded just like Tracy Chapman. The members of Supernova were not
impressed.

The problem with Josh is his desire to be the next
White Guy With Soul. There’s a long tradition of wanna-be-soulful white
guys: The Blues Brothers, Michael McDonald, Steve Winwood, Rick Astley,
and last season’s Ty Taylor. Unfortunately, America recently crowned
its newest White Guy With Soul when Taylor Hicks won American Idol. You’re a few months too late, Josh.

Storm – “Just What I Needed” by The Cars
Storm
still couldn’t get the Broadway out of her voice. This tendency will
probably put her out of the running for the job. Tommy’s performance
advice for Storm was that she should wear less clothing, because he’d
like to see more of her. Tommy’s compulsive need to remind everyone
that he is VERY HETEROSEXUAL is almost as grating as Tom Cruise’s. At
least Cruise has been in hiding lately, while he pretends to be a
father.

Lukas – “Let’s Spend the Night Together” by The Rolling Stones
Lukas
didn’t heed any of the voice coach’s advice about not singing from the
throat. But he does have charisma for a guy with skunk hair. And Gilby
liked the goth arrangement after all.

Jill – “All Right Now” by Free
Jill
wore some unfortunate porn star lipstick, but did an admirable job with
a song that has always lacked a certain punch for me. After her second
strong performance in a row — last week’s elimination show and tonight
— Gilby said, “Finally, I can imagine us behind you.” In his mind,
Tommy pumped his fist and said, “You got that right. She’s like a tiny
Pam.”

Ryan – “Fortunate Son” by Creedence Clearwater Revival
Yeeeaaaahhhh,
man! CCR! Too bad Ryan was totally bland. Gilby said Ryan didn’t look
like he was having any fun while he was performing. Ryan responded that
it was time to clear up the misconception that he never smiled. He
lowered his mic, looked at the camera, and smiled for ten seconds.
Funny, but probably not enough to keep him out of the bottom three.

Phil – “White Rabbit” by Jefferson Airplane
Jason
joined Phil on stage to play bass for the song, where Phil got in the
way of a Newsted head bang and received a split lip. This was Phil’s
best performance so far, but that’s not saying much.

Dana – “It’s My Life” by Bon Jovi
Dana
has consistently given off the vibe that she’d be the most rocking
counselor at a Baptist summer camp. She needs to go home, and I think
she will. Soon.

Toby – “Runaway Train” by Soul Asylum
Another lame song, and it zapped Toby of his cool Toby powers. Dave took a nap during the song, and I wanted to do the same.

Magni – “Plush” by Stone Temple Pilots
With
his hideous oversized sunglasses, Magni was trying to be either
Icelandic Bono (“Feed the hungry!”) or Icelandic Elderly Man (“Look
out, Farmer’s Market!”). This is kind of a dumb song too, but Magni has
magnetism. And tight jeans. I think I saw mini-Magni. (His Magni-toe?)

Zayra – “Everybody Hurts” by R.E.M.
Her
arrangement turned this into an Enya song, but, for the first time, her
La Vida Bjorka voice sounded pretty good. At the end of the
performance, she let out some screams that actually gave me goosebumps.
In a good way, even.

Jenny – “Drive” by Incubus
Jenny
performed a jangly, hippie-girl, indie-pop version of this song that
Gilby said was too Lillith Fair, and not enough OzzFest. I like Jenny,
just not as a member of this band. Get her on a double bill with Suzie
McNeil, and I’m there.

Dilana – “Zombie” by The Cranberries
Supernova
probably wishes they could boot everyone else right now and just pick
Dilana. She has a cool voice and great stage presence. She’s a Hot
Topic Stevie Nicks. Even the lighting crew went over the top for her.

It
seems like Dilana’s got this thing in the bag. But don’t forget that,
at this time last season, it seemed like there was no way that Jordis
could lose. It’s too early to hand the job to Dilana, even though she’s
got a significant edge on the competition.

Best Performances:
Dilana
Lukas
Magni

Worst Performances:
Josh
Dana
Ryan

Early Bottom Three:
Jenny
Dana
Ryan

I
wouldn’t be surprised if the early bottom three sticks as the final
bottom three. My vote went to Magni. His experience and confidence will
help him to improve each week, hopefully peaking when he’s in the final
three.