Monthly Archives: March 2006

You see that, Peter? (Episode 9-4)

Wanda & Desiree were eliminated on this week’s episode of The Amazing Race. It was sad to see an enjoyable team go. But it would have been sad to see any team go, as all of this season’s contestants have been entertaining, and most are likable. This week, even the villainous Lake was kind enough to give a drunk German a ride home.

Before teams could drive around Germany, they had to make it out of Russia…ALIVE! This episode picked up where last week’s left off, with Frat Guys Eric & Jeremy at the mat with Phil. Their clue instructed them to fly to Frankfurt, and then travel by train to Stuttgart.

Lake & Michelle arrived at the mat in second place, and Michelle muttered, “Oh, shoot,” when she realized they had to keep racing. Ray & Yolanda arrived shortly thereafter, and Yolanda also muttered, “Oh, shoot.” This foreshadowed the season’s big twist, in which we’ll discover that Yolanda and Michelle are long-lost sisters.

Hippies BJ & Tyler were more enthusiastic when they reached the mat. Upon receiving their clue, BJ handed Phil a dollar as a tip, which Tyler promptly reclaimed from Phil. BJ ran away yelling, “Don’t waste an opportunity, Phil,” a reference to Phil’s other TV show (and book) No Opportunity Wasted.

Fran & Barry finished searching nesting dolls for clues and landed on the mat before any of the teams that chose the trolley-washing Detour. Pink girls Dani & Danielle finished at the same time as Wanda & Desiree, followed by MoJo Monica & Joseph and Nerds David & Lori.

At the Moscow Airport, the Frats got tickets on a Lufthansa flight to Frankfurt, which was scheduled to leave at 7 p.m. But the flight was closed by the time Lake & Michelle arrived, just minutes after the Frats. Lake & Michelle got in a slow-moving Aeroflot line, and they were eventually able to book seats on a flight leaving at 9:15 p.m.

As other teams arrived, Lake & Michelle warned them about the slow lines. Eventually, the remaining seven teams clustered around two open ticket windows, only to be told the airline’s computers weren’t working.

The Hippies happened to be standing in front of a closed window, when an employee suddenly opened it for business. Of the remaining teams, they were the only other pair to receive tickets for the 9:15 flight. They joined Lake & Michelle on a mostly empty plane, while everyone else was forced to take a flight at 7 a.m. the next morning.

With a comfortable lead, the Frats were able to relax on the train to Stuttgart, asking a guy named Johan if German girls were pretty. Johan replied that German girls get prettier the more you drink. So in Germany, the girls are often very pretty.

The Frats arrived at the Mercedes-Benz test track in Stuttgart to discover that it didn’t open until 8:30 a.m. They spent the night in a hotel, as did Lake & Michelle and the Hippies.

The next morning, a driver sped them around the track at 170 km/hr, banking around “the wall of death,” a vertical wall that left Tyler slack-jawed with excitement. Teams then received their next clue, instructing them to drive their Mercedes to Ellbach Field in Bad Tolz, south of Munich.

Teams on the morning flight out of Moscow arrived in Stuttgart at 11:15 a.m. The teams stayed pretty even until leaving the Mercedes-Benz track for Ellbach. That’s when Wanda & Desiree’s problems began. First, Wanda persisted in asking for directions in English with an affected Spanish accent. Then, needing to head towards Munich on the Autobahn, she missed an exit, went the wrong direction, looped around, missed her exit again, and wound up facing the wrong way a second time.

Fortunately for Wanda & Desiree, they weren’t alone. The Pink team had equally poor senses of direction, so they followed Wanda & Desiree the whole time.

As the all-female teams struggled to get out of Stuttgart, the leaders were approaching Ellbach Field. Upon arriving at the field, teams were to select one member to undertake a Travelocity-sponsored Roadblock. One member had to look under an array of boots and oversized, pointy hats for Travelocity’s gnome mascot. A clue was attached to the gnome, who became an honorary third member of each team for the rest of the leg.

The Frats arrived at the field first, and Jeremy finished the task quickly. They immediately headed to their next destination, Bavaria Film Studio, near Munich.

Lake & Michelle asked for directions to the field from a guy named Hans, who was walking along the road. Hans informed them that he was too drunk to drive them to the field himself, but he would be happy to ride with them and give directions as he sobered up. Lake & Michelle found the field at about the same time as the hippies.

BJ found his gnome, but the Hippies stuck around, because Lake said Hans would give both teams directions to the studio once Lake had completed the task. Lake found his gnome, and both teams were off — after Lake & Michelle dropped Hans off at his house.

Fran & Barry, Ray & Yolanda, MoJo, and the Nerds all found their gnomes without incident.

At the film studio, a Detour offered teams the choice: “Break It” or “Slap It.” In “Break It,” teams had to break prop wine bottles over each others heads, and then check if the bottle’s label had the German word for cheers, “prost,” written on the inside of it. However, teams were only allowed to break one bottle at a time, and only when the cuckoo of a nearby clock chimed, every five minutes or so.

“Slap It” required teams to don lederhosen and properly perform a traditional dance. The primary movement in the dance was the thigh slap — the Old World version of the hand jive.

The Frats chose “Break It,” fulfilling what was surely a longtime fantasy of breaking things over each others heads. For safety reasons, they were required to wear lederhosen and felt hats.

In between smashing bottles, Eric & Jeremy flirted with a blond woman in traditional garb who waited to give them their clue. When they finally found a correct label, she kissed each of them on the cheek.

The Hippies and Lake & Michelle also decided to “Break It.” Lake & Michelle found their clue quickly, after Lake’s attempt at gentleness failed and he banged Michelle in the forehead. She only got to break one bottle over his head, but looked like she wished she’d had a few more chances.

Tyler held his team up because he wasn’t wearing underwear and needed to find someplace private to change into his lederhosen. BJ & Tyler howled, “Ow!” with each blow to the head. After finding their clue, BJ spoke some German, telling the blond woman that he wanted to take her out dancing.

Fran & Barry were the next team to make it to the studio, and they fell back into their old habit of choosing the wrong Detour. They decided to dance, but the music’s fast tempo made it hard for them to keep up. After several attempts, the dance instructor decided their sloppy slaps were good enough and gave them their clue.

This last clue finally directed teams to the Pit Stop. In Munich, teams needed to find the Siegestor, a large arch at the city’s center. The Frats came in first, winning an adventure trip to Africa. Phil noticed lipstick on the guys’ cheeks and said they were the two biggest Casanovas in the history of the race. Jeremy said he hoped the Pink girls wouldn’t be eliminated, so he and Eric could spend some time at the Pit Stop “tongue wrestling” with them.

The Hippies went for a grand entrance, running backwards to the mat. As they approached, Phil turned to the German man next to him and said, “You see that, Peter? They’re running backwards.” BJ jumped on the mat, looked at the white-bearded Peter and exclaimed, “Santa!”

Lake & Michelle arrived in third place, after bickering in the car. Lake told Michelle to “zip the negativity,” and she responded with her best impression of Lake, mimicking his “C’mon, baby! Yeah!” delivery.

At Bavaria Film, MoJo, Ray & Yolanda, and the Nerds broke bottles. Only the Nerds were able to find one of the correct bottles quickly, so MoJo switched to the dancing Detour. When they succeeded on the first try, Ray & Yolanda swtiched too. It turned out that “Slap It” wasn’t necessarily the tougher detour; it was just the tougher detour for Fran & Barry.

It was dusk by the time Wanda & Desiree and the Pinks found Ellbach Field. When Danielle found her gnome, Desiree started to lose the will to fight. After keeping her mom from freaking out for most of the race thus far, she was running out of energy.

With Wanda’s encouragement, Desiree found a gnome, and they continued on. They arrived at the studio just as the Pinks were leaving. Wanda & Desiree did a great job dancing, but they were just barely too far behind to catch Dani & Danielle, who parked their car and got to the mat just before the mother-daughter team.

When Wanda & Desiree arrived at the mat, Phil told them they’d been eliminated. Desiree said, “These last four days have been hell.” But Wanda tried to stay upbeat, saying she appreciated the time they had together.

This was one of my favorite episodes in a long time. Teams are still working with each other, and no unnecessary inter-team rivalries have sprung up. There’s plenty of drama inherent in the format of the race, and manufactured negative drama has detracted from the show’s quality for the last few seasons.

That said, there was one thing that disappointed me in tonight’s episode. Bavaria Film is the studio where Das Boot and The Neverending Story were filmed. The studio’s tours showcase the full-scale puppet Falkor that was used in that film, and damnit, I wanted to see Falkor.

Next week, it looks like teams might be traveling to Italy, where they have to search lines of laundry for clues. And Lori has a meltdown during a Roadblock that looks like it involves mannequins. If only she could summon the spirit of Hollywood Montrose to help her.

Brent Stank (Episode 5-4)

After annoying teammates and audiences alike, Brent finally annoyed Donald Trump enough to get fired from The Apprentice. Even though his biggest contribution was making his team late, Brent still felt he was the most qualified candidate.

Tarek and Lenny returned from the boardroom at the beginning of the episode, and Tarek told everyone that Theresa was fired for not bringing Charmaine into the boardroom. Charmaine retired to her room to cry. She was comforted by Leslie, who spoke her first words of the season. She reminds me of my little brother when he was a kid. It took each of them a long time to start talking, but when they did, it was in complete sentences.

To prove Trump shouldn’t have targeted her, Charmaine decided to manage Gold Rush on their new task. Teams created billboards to promote Post’s new cereal, Grape Nuts Trail Mix Crunch. (I live a mile away from a Post factory, and there is nothing better than the sweet smell of Cocoa Pebbles wafting through the suburban night air.)

Trump’s advice for the teams was to “keep it simple.” That’s exactly what Synergy didn’t do. Tammy, the team’s Project Manager, chose to go with Allie’s idea of the cereal being “the next generation of Grape Nuts,” a concept that’s hard to communicate through one signature image and minimal text, which is usually all you want on a billboard.

While searching for models on the streets of Manhattan, Sean, Allie, and Roxanne selected a young-looking guy in his forties to portray the father of a woman in her mid-twenties. This totally defeated the team’s concept of one generation passing something on to another. Instead, it looked like a flannel-wearing, average-looking guy giving a box of cereal to his hot girlfriend. New Yorkers driving by the billboard would probably just assume it was for the Broadway musical version of According to Jim.

Andrea designed some busy, text-heavy graphics that distracted further from the concept. When Brent asked Tammy if he could make the team’s presentation to the Post execs, she told him he didn’t look fit enough to tell them about health food. She had a point, though the team wasn’t promoting the healthful aspects of the cereal.

Gold Rush made better luck for themselves, selecting a girl-next-door type for their ad. She donned workout gear and pretended to chug cereal straight from the box. Charmaine kept her team focused on the concept, producing a clear billboard the Post execs called “brilliant.” After Andrea’s breakdown last week, Charmaine became the second PM in a row to go from crying to victory over the course of an episode.

For their reward, Gold Rush cooked and dined with the head chef at Trump International Hotel, Jean George. Master chef George ribbed Lenny for adding cayenne pepper to his already-finished dishes and insisting that the chef add vodka to everything.

While Gold Rush dined out, Synergy moped in the suite. In someone’s bed, Allie and Roxanne draped themselves all over Sean and talked about the loss. Sean managed to pretend he was upset, too, despite this being the greatest moment of his life.

Tension was high as the team entered the boardroom. Trump asked Roxanne what she thought of Tammy’s performance, and Roxanne replied that Tammy was the best Project Manager so far. Andrea bristled at the comment, since she lead the team to victory last week.

Brent had a different opinion of Tammy. “I thought she stank as a Project Manager,” Brent said, opening the floodgates for his team members to attack him. Andrea said Brent was a liability, and he retorted, “You’re a liability.”

Brent continued ranting about his accomplishments, and Roxanne laughed when he said, “They’d be 0-4 without me.” Trump wasn’t sympathetic when Brent told him how Tammy didn’t want a fat person presenting the team’s ad campaign to the Post executives. Trump said, “I’m not in the greatest shape, either.” He admitted that, in a similar situation, his model daughter Ivanka (who again subbed for Carolyn as viceroy this week) might be a better choice.

Trump didn’t even give Tammy the option to bring anyone back into the boardroom. Instead, in front of the entire team, Trump criticized Brent for not learning from experience. Because Brent had never adjusted his behavior to fit in with his teammates, he was fired.

In the cab on his way home, Brent insisted that he was the only true leader on Synergy.

Next week, the teams must complete their tasks aboard a cruise ship before it leaves port. The waters are choppy for both teams as Lenny and Roxanne freak out on their teammates.

Rock Star: Supernova

On Thursday, CBS announced which band will find its lead singer on the second season of Rock Star. This summer’s winning contestant will front the new band, Supernova, a supergroup currently comprising Tommy Lee, Gilby Clarke, and Jason Newsted.

Producer Mark Burnett decided to create a band from scratch, rather than fill the empty spot in a preexisting band. Tommy Lee, of Motley Crue and porn tape fame, was so eager be a part of the show that he and his genitalia signed on as a co-executive producers and drummers for the new group.

Gilby Clarke played guitar for Guns N’ Roses during the Use Your Illusion era. Since he was able to put up with Axl Rose’s inflated ego, Gilby must be a saint. And if you’ve seen the documentary Metallica: Some Kind of Monster, you know that bassist Jason Newsted was the smartest member of the band. He’s the one that got out.

One of the best pieces of news for Rock Star’s sophomore season is that Butch Walker will co-write songs for Supernova and produce the band’s first album. If Butch Walker’s name doesn’t ring a bell, he’s written for and produced The Donnas, Pink, and Avril Lavigne, for whom he wrote the hit, “My Happy Ending.” (If that wasn’t teen angst we were hearing, and instead was a girl evoking a man’s mid-life crisis, I guess I haven’t given Avril enough credit for emotional range.)

More importantly, Butch fronted the band Marvelous 3, whose 1998 single, “Freak of the Week,” is as good a power pop song as you’ll ever hear. Those of you who unapologetically read Metal Edge magazine in its heyday may remember when Butch graced the rag’s pages as a member of Southgang.

Impish Dave Navarro and scantily-clad Brooke Burke return as the show’s hosts. They’ll be joined each week by a celebrity guest judge. So far, Slash, Moby, Rob Zombie, and Macy Gray have agreed to appear as judges. It’s too bad Zombie and Gray can’t appear on the same episode, ’cause there’s the potential for the weirdest duet since Cindy Lauper and Frank Sinatra performed “Santa Claus Is Comin’ to Town.”

If you’d like to apply for one of the 16 spots on the show, audition tapes are due March 24th, so hurry up. I wonder if Dave Navarro’s already asked his beloved Sweet Suzie McNeil to try out a second time.

Talent Shines on Nashville Star (Episode 4-1)

If you’re a fan of TV vocal competitions, do yourself a favor and tune in to Nashville Star. The show’s fourth season premiered this week on the USA Network, without any lousy auditions or camera hogging wannabes. Viewers were treated to ten top-notch performances by singers with a future in country music.

Don’t be turned off if you’re not a fan of country. I’m not that fond of it myself, but I enjoy good performances, no matter what style of music. Throughout each season of Nashville Star, contestants perform classic and contemporary country, southern rock, and original songs as well.

It’s one thing to cover other artists’ songs, another to write your own material and play an instrument. All of the contestants on Nashville Star can do both, and many currently make a living as performers. They’re more experienced in front of live audiences than the contestants on American Idol, if you don’t count high school swing choir shows.

New hosts for this season are country music legend Wynonna, and the man who invented country-rap, Cowboy Troy. Troy smoothly delivered all of his lines with a grin, and kept things light. Wynonna played mother hen, offering advice to all of the contestants.

Judges Phil Vassar and Anastasia Brown return for another season. Phil’s written countless country hits, and Anastasia is the A&R wiz who discovered Keith Urban. So, win or lose, contestants would be wise to heed their advice.

Each week, the two regular judges will be joined by a guest celebrity judge, which is sort of a mixed blessing. The premiere’s guest judges were Big & Rich, whose comments ranged from somewhat insightful to barely intelligible. Next week’s guest judge is comedian Larry the Cable Guy; who knows what advice he can offer contestants.

All of the contestants gave good performances, but Casey Rivers and Matt Mason emerged as early favorites, with rich voices and cowboy good looks. Nicole Jamrose, a married mother of two, is the sentimental favorite to win. She’s got a distinctive voice and an aura of coolness.

Some of the contestants may not be true contenders, but their unique style makes the show interesting. Shy Blakemore looks like Bret Michaels from Poison and performs without shoes. Kristen McNamara is a blond California girl who yodeled for her opening number.

Although all of the contestants are talented singers, not all of them have star power. Monique LeCompte has a beautiful voice, but the judges said she’s more Broadway than country. And Jewels Hanson rocked her butt off, but she was a little over the top for the judges’ tastes.

Before voting opened to the public, the judges eliminated Jewels Hanson. Since Jewels sold her Harley Davidson to make the trip from California, Wynonna offered to loan one of the Harleys from her own collection so they could ride together.

The second episode airs Tuesday, March 21, at 10 p.m. Eastern. Special guest Gretchen Wilson will perform and the results of the first audience vote will be announced. If you’d like to catch up on the performances from the first episode, USA Network is reairing the season premiere this Saturday, March 18 at 10 a.m. Eastern.

DwtS Offseason Update: 3-15-06

If you want to let us in on any DwtS news or upcoming events, please email us (myoxisbroken@gmail.com) and give us the scoop!

Meet Cheryl This Sunday
If you’re in the Santa Monica area, Cheryl Burke will be appearing at the Blues Jean Bar on Sunday, March 19. “Drew Crew” and “Dance On, Cheryl” shirts will be for sale, and 10% of the event proceeds go to USA Dance, a charity that promotes ballroom dancing.


The event will be held from 5-7 p.m. The Blues Jean Bar is located at 1409 Montana Avenue, Santa Monica, California, 90403. For more info, call 310-656-7898.

Cheryl on Extra
Cheryl will interviewed on Extra this Saturday, March 18. Follow this link to find out what time the show will air in your area.

Possible New Co-Host for DWTS 3
On March 1, The New York Post reported that Lisa Rinna could be Tom Bergeron’s co-host for DWTS 3. Samantha Harris might then become an entertainment correspondent for ABC’s Good Morning America. (The archived article is still available here, though you must be a registered Post reader to view it.)

Stars at the Oscars
Star also spotted Tia Carrere and Stacy Keibler shopping (separately) before the Oscars. Check out what they got in their gift bags. Lisa and Harry Hamlin were guests at Elton John’s Oscar party.

Two More Seasons on Order from ABC
An article at Fashion Monitor Toronto is reporting that ABC has scheduled both fall and winter seasons of DwtS for the upcoming year. The article doesn’t give any sources, but considering the show’s success, it would be a surprise if ABC doesn’t slate two seasons.

Master P on Trial
Master P’s no contest plea on his gun possession charges earned him 40 hours of community service. Hey, he was just doing it for the Katrina victims. Zap2It has the full story.

I’m Gonna Punch You in the Mouth (Episode 9-3)

There was no relief in sight when teams ended the latest leg of The Amazing Race. Teams arrived on the mat behind St. Basil’s Cathedral in Moscow’s Red Square, only to have Phil tell them there was no Pit Stop and they had to continue racing.

Before heading to Russia, teams had to finish their business in Brazil. That included an early morning zipline ride, 300 feet over the countryside. Hippies BJ & Tyler were the first team to leave, at 4:48 a.m., but the zip line did not open until 7:00.

Frat Guys Jeremy & Eric were just minutes behind the Hippies, who waited on the side of the road to jump out and scare the Frats as they arrived at the zip line. Monica & Joseph (MoJo) and Nerds Lori & Dave also arrived before the ride opened.

These first four teams stand a very good chance of being the final four teams in the race. In addition to being capable racers, these teams all get along with each other. Season 9 is the most enjoyable since Season 5, largely because teams are willing to help each other. In Season 5, eventual winners Chip & Kim often helped the perpetually confused twins, Kami & Karli. It’s nice to see producers casting teams that you want to succeed, as was the norm in the show’s early seasons.

At the end of the zipline, teams received a clue instructing them to fly to Moscow, Russia. There they would have to travel by taxi to a large, outdoor swimming pool used to train Russian Olympians.

First, the couples needed to drive to the bus station in Brotas, Brazil. Three charter buses took them to the international airport in Sao Paolo. The Hippies, the Frats, MoJo, and the Nerds filled up the spots on the first bus at 9:15.

As the first bus left, some of the other teams were still finishing the zipline. Lake & Michelle had left the Pit Stop in seventh place, but they’d gotten lost. Michelle warned Lake he was going the wrong way, and he replied, “Shut up.” She later paid him back by threatening to punch him in the mouth. If only she’d followed through. After Lake finally admitted being lost, he parked their VW Bug in the middle of a cornfield and stood on top of the car to see where they were, denting the vehicle’s roof in the process.

Ray & Yolanda, Wanda & Desiree, Lake & Michelle, and The Pink Girls, Danielle & Dani, eventually made it to the bus station in time for the second charter bus, which left at 10:00. Oldsters Fran & Barry, who didn’t leave the Pit Stop until 8:45, were the only team on the 10:45 bus.

At the airport, all of the teams purchased tickets for the same Lufthansa flight to Moscow, via Frankfurt, Germany. Onboard, the Pink Girls learned Russian translations of useful phrases (e.g., “Go fast!”) from a fellow passenger. After disembarking, the Frat Guys sweet talked the girls into sharing a cab to the pool.

At the pool, teams encountered a Roadblock, which required one team member to jump off a 10-meter diving board and retrieve a clue underwater. BJ and Tyler arrived first, and Tyler elected to take the plunge, ensuring that–while we might have two Hippies on the race–we’d only have one unwashed Hippie. He stripped off his “T-Tow” t-shirt, which he explained was the power word that symbolized the “circle of the universe” for him and BJ.

Fran & Barry benefited from a fast cab, and Barry completed the task in second place. Ray & Yolanda arrived in third, and Yolanda chose to dive, despite her inability to swim. After a few uneasy minutes at top of the platform, other teams arrived and cheered for her. As she got out of the pool with their clue, a Russian woman told her, “Good girl.”

The task went smoothly for most of the teams, except Wanda & Desiree. Wanda had no problem making the jump off of the platform. But her fear of drowning sent her into hysterics, and she wasn’t able to retrieve their underwater clue. Desiree calmed her mother, and, with the encouragement of several Russian men who were watching, Wanda dove and got the clue.

Everyone else was already on their way to a monastery to find the next clue, and Wanda & Desiree feared the delay might have cost them the race. But, on their way to the monastery, Dani realized that she’d left her bag with the clues, passports, and money in the pool’s changing room. She and Danielle jumped out of the cab they were sharing with the Frats and got a ride back to the pool.

BJ & Tyler were first to the monastery’s cathedral, and they took a minute to admire the artwork before deciding which Detour to take. Their options were to “Scrub” a Moscow trolley inside and out, or “Scour” hundreds of Russian nesting dolls for a tiny clue.

The Hippies chose the first option, but their cab driver couldn’t find the trolley yard. Fran & Barry caught up to the Hippies, and both teams decided to do the other task instead.

Lake & Michelle and the Frat Guys both wanted to do the trolley task as well, but they couldn’t communicate with their cab drivers. As Ray & Yolanda left the monastery in their cab, the other two teams instructed their drivers to follow.

But Ray & Yolanda had elected to search the dolls. Lake & Michelle and the Frats were dismayed at first, but all three teams joked around as a band played and dancers swirled around them. The Frats and Lake & Michelle found their clues quickly and headed for their next destination: Red Square.

Fran & Barry arrived at the theater and started searching the dolls. Ray & Yolanda found their clue just as the Hippies arrived. The Hippies found their clue quickly, sending Fran & Barry into this week’s requisite panic.

The Pink Girls made it back to the pool just as Wanda & Desiree were leaving. Filled with hope, Wanda & Desiree found one of the few cabbies in Moscow who knew where the trolley depot was. The Pink Girls arrived at the depot shortly after, followed by MoJo and the Nerds, who eventually stumbled upon the location in their shared cab.

Lake & Michelle and the Frats found Red Square at nearly the same time, but Eric & Jeremy made it to the mat first. Phil told them that they weren’t finished racing. He then handed them their next clue, as the episode ended.

Next week, Fran & Barry dance in lederhosen, which means teams will be flying to either Germany or Pennsylvania.

It’s Not My Problem (Episode 5-3)

Theresa’s corporate retreat was tacky and offensive, earning her a hearty “You’re Fired!” from The Donald on tonight’s Apprentice. And the loss by Gold Rush put Lenny the Russian in fighting form again.

Brent’s return from last week’s boardroom sent Andrea into the bathroom, where she cried and hid for a long time. After she reemerged, she decided to be Synergy’s project manager this week, just to prove that somebody could manage Brent,

Before receiving this week’s task, Dan and Lee of Gold Rush announced that they would be observing the Jewish New Year, and would not be able to participate. Apparently, interviews for TV game shows like The Apprentice don’t count as work, as they were still able to participate in those. NBC added Fiddler on the Roof-style music to a shot of Dan and Lee walking to temple.

Lenny, who is also Jewish, described the decision not to work as “f***ing stupid.” He reasoned that Israeli soldiers don’t get out of work on holidays, so neither should the candidates.

Trump assigned the task of holding a corporate retreat for GM dealers, to whom the teams to introduce the 2007 Chevy Tahoe. Teams needed to find a fun way of familiarizing dealers with the car.

Synergy wisely ignored Brent’s idea to give the dealers massages, and instead came up with the theme “Nature Refined.” They planned a day of outdoorsy activities, like rock climbing, fly fishing, and skeet shooting.

When they realized skeet shooting wasn’t allowed in their park, Andrea quickly came up with a much better idea: golf cart races. Throughout the day, her team also let dealers test drive the Tahoe, as Sean read vehicle specs from the backseat. With his meager knowledge of cars, Sean probably thought the “V8” he kept mentioning was a tomato drink. But his British accent made him sound like an authority, just the same.

Theresa led the undermanned Gold Rush, giving Tarek creative control of the event. She then ignored Tarek’s pleas for a theme, and instead decided to offer the dealers such disparate activities as mini-golf, a horse and buggy ride, and a performance by a comedian. Several times, she used the word “classy” to describe her vision of the event.

In addition to those highbrow activities, Theresa decided to showcase the Tahoe on a rotating platform as models stood by, as at a car show. But this was a one-car show in the middle of a dirt track of a park. No word on whether Theresa’s version of class accounts for corn dogs, monster trucks, and late-night nutria hunts.

Just before the event, Tarek dug golf holes in ugly, dried out patches of grass, because Theresa refused to order astroturf. Not a wise decision, considering Trump’s viceroy, Carolyn, runs golf courses for a living and was on-site to inspect.

Lenny set up the stage and tents, but he neglected to procure a generator to make the stage rotate, protesting, “It’s not my problem.” Brice ordered a generator and spent the rest of the episode screaming hysterically at Lenny, “I saved your ass!”

Gold Rush’s horse and buggy sucked, their mini-golf was pathetic, and the models didn’t know a thing about the Tahoe. But the final blow came when their comedian, a former Last Comic Standing contestant hired by Charmaine, gave a crude, unfunny performance that offended everyone. Even though the comedian bombed, Charmaine still paid her the full appearance fee of $1700.

After the events, the dealers filled out surveys. In their opinion, Synergy destroyed Gold Rush. The Synergy members were given a chance to swim with sharks at Atlantis Marine World on Long Island. Brent had concerns for his safety, but, to his team’s dismay, the sharks did not eat him.

Theresa was sick of Lenny’s attitude, proving that she doesn’t know a potential TV icon when she sees one. So, she brought him into the boardroom along with Tarek, who bore the responsibility for the crummy putting green.

Carolyn, substitute viceroy Bill Rancic, Trump, and even Tarek absolved Lenny of responsibility for the team’s loss. Tarek’s defense for the golf course was that, even though it stunk, at least people enjoyed it, unlike the comedian and the buggy ride.

Trumped harped on Theresa for not bringing Charmaine into the board room, when she was not only responsible for the comedian, but also for hiring the clueless models. Theresa was soon fired, earning a big grin from Lenny. On his way out, Trump told Tarek, “You better step it up… if you can.”

Next week, Brent loses his mind. He’d better make it fast, before the audience loses interest in him.