DwtS 3, Week 7: Performance Show

For this week’s Dancing with the Stars
Performance Show, the remaining contestants must have felt like they’d
wandered into the land of a thousand dances. Each couple performed a
pair of routines, before passing out from exhaustion.

The show
was split into two rounds: a Ballroom round, followed by a Latin round.
The scores from both of tonight’s rounds were added to the judges’
scores from last week, for a total possible score of 90 points.

Ballroom Round

Jerry Springer & Kym Johnson – Foxtrot
After
last week’s subpar Paso Doble, Jerry’s daughter Katie called and said,
“Dad, I love you, but you can do better.” So he came back to practice
with a serious demeanor, determined to “give the [Foxtrot] the dignity
it deserves.”

Jerry & Kym looked snazzy dancing to “My Way”
by Frank Sinatra. It was a well-executed, tasteful performance. Dancing
well was the best way for Jerry to show Kym how much he appreciates her
own hard work, and they both looked pleased as they made their way to
the judges’ table.

Len asked Jerry, “Were you proud of yourself
tonight? You should be proud. Tonight, you danced the correct way.”
Bruno said, “It’s like watching Fred Flintstone turn into Fred Astaire.”
Carrie Ann said, “I want to see you come back and do your Latin with
confidence and exuberance.”
Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…8, Len…8, Bruno…8 = 24/30

Monique Coleman & Louis van Amstel – Quickstep
Monique
and her High School Musical co-star Ashley Tinsdale had a girls day
out, and they dragged Louis with them. “Never go shopping with women,”
he grumbled.

Dancing to the classic, “Luck Be a Lady,” Monique
executed her holds and kept her posture. It felt like a proper
Quickstep, which was just what the judges were looking for. Louis lost
hold of Monique’s leg during their final pose.

Bruno paused for
dramatic effect and said, “Well…the wild child has turned into a
magic lady tonight. That was sheer elegance.” Carrie Ann addressed the
crowd first, “I don’t know if you all saw that, but she danced half the
routine with her foot stuck in her dress. If you hadn’t stumbled, it
would’ve been a 10.” Len said, “There was no luck in that. It was
bright, it was light, it was dynamite.”
Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…9, Len…9, Bruno…9 = 27/30

Emmitt Smith & Cheryl Burke – Waltz
Cheryl
& Emmitt had a spa day, complete with pedicure. Emmitt bragged,
“I’ve got the prettiest male toes in all of L.A.” He wasn’t as excited
about practicing the Waltz, though: “It’s boring!” But Cheryl enjoyed
their rehearsals, saying “Emmitt looks like a ballerina.”

They danced to “Hushabye Mountain” from the film Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.
It was a lovely, smooth performance. Emmitt’s hand and arm movements
looked pretty polished — especially for an ex-football player.

Carrie
Ann said, “Amazing. I was mesmerized by your footwork.” Len called the
performance, “Lovely jubbly. There was a harmony between you. But
sometimes, when you’re apart, your arms are a little bit wooden.” Bruno
called Emmitt “the lord of the manor.”
Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…10, Len…9, Bruno…9 = 28/30

Mario Lopez & Karina Smirnoff – Foxtrot
Learning
two dances at the same time made Mario grumpy and difficult to work
with. “We hope it’s going to come together,” Karina said.

Karina
wore a blond wig as the couple danced to Marilyn Monroe’s “I Wanna be
Loved by You.” Karina channeled Marilyn, blowing kisses to the judges
during the routine. Mario might as well have been anybody, because
Karina stole the show.

Bruno praised “the playboy and the sex
kitten. That was delicious entertainment.” Carrie Ann said, “You both
were fantastic.” Len said, “I can’t believe we’re seeing such a high
standard of dancing tonight, considering that you’re doing two dances.
But I have to say, it’s the first time I’ve seen a Foxtrot without one
heel lead.” Bruno voiced his disagreement with a loud, “Oooooh!”
Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…10, Len…9, Bruno…10 = 29/30

Joey Lawrence & Edyta Sliwinska – Foxtrot
Joey
was excited to be dancing to “Singin’ in the Rain.” He loves the movie,
and Gene Kelly is one of his heroes. So, Edyta took Joey to practice on
the lot where the movie was filmed, and then sprayed him with a garden
hose for the proper effect.

Dancing with an umbrella as a prop,
Joey & Edyta spent lots of time apart at beginning of the routine.
It was a very lively dance, and they broke twice in the middle for more
of Joey’s tap moves — reminiscent of his first week in the
competition. Though Joey and Edyta danced apart for much of the
routine, it looked like they were truly having fun.

Len told
Joey, “You’re a great ballroom dancer, but as with Mario, no heels, all
balls.” Bruno said, “That was a great tribute to a Hollywood legend.”
Carrie Ann added, “That was flawless.”
Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…10, Len…9, Bruno…10 = 29/30

Latin Round

Jerry Springer & Kym Johnson – Mambo
As
expected, Jerry’s 64-year-old hips were pretty stationary. But the
routine was worth watching just for Kym and her killer dress. She’s
been a real asset to the cast, and I hope she returns for season four.
At the end of the dance, Jerry challenged the judges, “How ’bout them
hips?”

Carrie told Jerry, “You’re a joy to watch, but you’re not
on the same level as everyone else.” Len said, “I don’t care if it’s
not up to the standards of the others. You’ve brought so much joy to
the show.” Bruno speculated, “I don’t think the public will let you go
on vacation. You make us laugh. It’s great to have you.”

When he
received his scores, Jerry said, “It shows how professional they are.
They say such nice things, and then give me the lowest scores. It shows
they have integrity.”
Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…7, Len…8, Bruno…7 = 22/30

Monique Coleman & Louis van Amstel – Paso Doble
Monique
& Louis had the misfortune of dancing to the only inappropriate
song of the night: “The Reflex,” by Duran Duran. The song really
distracted from the dancing, but from what I remember, Monique was a
good cape.

Len said, “I think you produced two great
performances tonight. Apart from a few underarm turns, you did great.”
Bruno told Monique, “You’re a tough cookie tonight.” Carrie Ann said,
“You have to represent the women, and you did tonight. But you
overpowered yourself a bit at the end.”
Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…9, Len…9, Bruno…9 = 27/30

Emmitt Smith & Cheryl Burke – Mambo
Emmitt
shimmied like no man has ever shimmied before. He and Cheryl were so
comfortable on the dance floor, it almost didn’t feel like a calculated
routine; it just looked like two people dancing and having fun. At
times, Emmitt and Cheryl looked like they were about to break out
laughing, yet they missed hardly a step.

Bruno said, “The beast
is unleashed. If you keep going like this, God knows what’s going to
happen.” Carrie Ann upgraded Emmitt from “Twinkle Toes” to “Sir
Shimmy.” Len said, “Of every dance I’ve seen this whole season, that
was the best.” The crowd, hoping for a perfect score, booed Bruno when
he raised his “9” paddle.
Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…10, Len…10, Bruno…9 = 29/30

Mario Lopez & Karina Smirnoff – Jive
Mario
& Karina danced to a slightly slow version of “Shake a Tail
Feather.” It looked like the music’s pace forced them to hold back, and
they could have danced much faster. Karina’s legs still managed to look
fabulous.

Carrie Ann complimented the couple on their “great
synchronization. I felt you seemed a bit uncertain at the beginning.”
Len said,”It had vitality. The only little thing… Sometimes when
you’re holding your partners hand, [your other] hand is hanging like a
bit of cotton from a knicker leg. But apart from that, I loved it.”
Bruno declared, “It was another crowd pleaser from the great teaser.”
Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…9, Len…9, Bruno…9 = 27/30

Joey Lawrence & Edyta Sliwinska – Mambo
Joey
& Edyta danced to the song, “Mambo No. 5.” The performance was very
entertaining, even if it did end with Joey’s face suggestively planted
in Edyta’s stomach. When compared to Emmitt’s Mambo, Joey’s arms looked
a little stiff. But he still managed put those arms to good use,
executing some tricky moves.

Carrie Ann told Joey, “That’s the
first time I saw you loosen up and have a good time.” Bruno said, “You
were the only one who did all the underarm passes.” Len told Joey, “I
was impressed with your hips. You gave it a bit of welly.”
Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…9, Len…9, Bruno…10 = 28/30

Leaderboard:
1 – Mario (84/90)
2 – Emmitt – (82/90)
3 – Joey (81/90)
4 – Monique (77/90)
5 – Jerry (64/90)

My
vote went to Emmitt & Cheryl. Of all of the men left in the
competition, Emmitt’s the only one who’s not being outshined by his
partner. That’s a credit to him, for being able to keep up with Cheryl.
And it’s a credit to Cheryl, for tailoring the routine to her partner’s
strengths, rather than trying to cover up his deficiencies with her own
flashy moves.

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