Samantha Harris returns to her Dancing with the Stars hosting duties tonight, and Reality Blurred’s Andy Denhart (writing for MSNBC) paid tribute to her ineptitude and the unintentional hilarity that ensues.
Sabrina Bryan and Jennie Garth have spent the weekend preparing for the Paso Doble, while Mark Cuban tried to get his brain and body in sync for the Viennese Waltz. Jennie also warned 90210 fans to look for Ian Ziering in the studio audience tonight.
Tuesday night’s DwtS Results Show will feature two performances by Gloria Estefan. Some of the DwtS pros will dance as Glo sings "Rhythm Is Gonna Get You," and she will be accompanied by her own backup dancers as she sings "A Bailar" from her new album. So You Think You Can Dance choreographer Wade Robson is the night’s featured guest dancer.
A trailer has been released for the upcoming Dancing with the Stars video game. I’m still not sure what I think about it.
Seeing as today is Blog Action Day, where bloggers try to draw attention to environmental issues, here’s a link to an article I read at MSN yesterday about American toy companies. For those of us in the U.S., buying American-made toys produces fewer greenhouse gases during transportation and eliminates the risk of kids being exposed to the lead paint used in many Chinese-made toys.
The previous season’s Bachelor, Lt. Andy Baldwin, deploys to Iraq in January. His rep says the deployment factored in when Baldwin broke up with on-air love Tessa Horst. If nothing else, "I’m heading to Iraq" sounds more believable than, "It’s not you; It’s me."
The American Idol Tour has been fined $5000 for violating New York child labor laws — yet another problem that can be attributed to Sanjaya.
New episodes of Tim Gunn’s Guide to Style, which was supposed to fill the gap between seasons of Top Chef and Project Runway, have been pulled until PR returns, so that Gunn’s bland show can get its own makeover.
Simon Pegg has just been added to the cast of the upcoming Star Trek movie in the role of Scotty. Pegg is the man behind zombie cult hit Shaun of the Dead and buddy cop comedy Hot Fuzz, which might be the funniest movie I’ve ever seen.
On this week’s Survivor: China, Dave learned the hard way that you can only be a leader when people want to follow you.
Winning their first Immunity Challenge hadn’t done much to change the mood at Zhan Hu’s camp. Sherea became the mouthpiece of the tribe, which was frustrated with Dave’s bossy style of leadership. After he criticized her method of separating moldy rice from the non-moldy rice in their container, she let him have it.
The feud was interrupted by a nighttime Reward Challenge. Using giant chopsticks, two teammates had to carry a flaming metal ball to a wok. Once inside the wok, the ball ignited some fireworks, which probably scared the crap out of the monkeys and pandas living in the forest.
The first team to light all three of their woks won fishing and cooking lessons from a local family the following morning. And one lucky member of the losing tribe would be kidnapped and benefit from the morning’s feast as well.
Both teams struggled to wield the awkward wooden poles, but Fei Long was victorious in the end. They kidnapped Dave — and quickly realized how annoying he was. Dave repeatedly hugged everyone, for any reason. When he found out Courtney was from New York, Dave sang, "I love that Plaaace!" and hugged Courtney, shattering her frail skeleton and killing her instantly.
Gravedigger James politely asked Dave not to hug him. But Todd gritted his teeth and palled around with Dave, who rewarded Todd’s tolerance with a clue to the hidden Immunity Idol.
The next morning, a fisherman, his wife, and kids arrived at camp. Out of nowhere, Jean-Robert began speaking Mandarin with the family. Todd gushed, "It was FANTASTIC!" Jean-Robert translated the wife’s directions while most of the tribe helped prepare the meal.
Meanwhile, Aaron and Denise were out on the lake learning fishing techniques. The fisherman tied a cord around the necks of his pet water birds and sent them into the lake to catch fish. Since the cord prevented the cormorants from swallowing the fish, the fisherman directed the birds to spit the fish out into the boat.
Now all Aaron and Denise need to do is catch and train some of their own birds. Or they could just use the net they’d already won at an earlier Reward Challenge.
They headed back to shore to chow down. The meal looked scrumptious, even to a well-fed vegetarian like me. As mulleted Boston lunchlady Denise put it, "Flavor has never tasted so good! …That was the delicate-est thing I have ever put in my mouth."
Over at the Zhan Hu camp, the atmosphere was much more relaxed without Dave around. But it also took an extraordinary amount of willpower for the tribe to get up and feed themselves.
Sherea decided she could best contribute to the team by conserving her energy for challenges (i.e., laying in the shelter and letting everyone else do all the work). "I’m gonna ride the work horse ’til the tail come off," she said, "because I’m not doing anything ’til I have to."
Sherea’s conservation efforts were put to the test at the next Immunity Challenge.
Two teammates at a time donned traditional Chinese armor and threw three sets of meteor hammers (three rocks connected by a rope) across an outdoor arena and past a pair of opponents, attempting to shatter porcelain vases. Meanwhile, the opposing pair was trying to do the same, only in the opposite direction. After three rounds of battle (two men, two women, and co-ed), the team that had broken the most vases would be declared winner.
While Sherea’s vast energy reserves allowed her to smash one of her opponents vases, Jaime was able to break two even after having helped at camp. And their efforts still couldn’t defeat Fei Long.
Peih-Gee, Frosti, Erik, and Jaime had to decide whether to eliminate pushy Dave or listless Sherea. Despite a last ditch PR effort by Dave, the tribe decided enough was enough and cut him loose. Dave tried to explain his downfall: "I gave it my all. Perhaps I gave it too much."
Next time, Erik and Jamie form a love connection, and Survivor: China has its first "big twist."
People filed another report of Floyd Mayweather, Jr.’s negative comments about the DwtS judges, evidently hoping that it will become a full-fledged controversy. Floyd says he thinks his Jive deserved a 25 or 26 — a score which would’ve placed him above Helio on the leaderboard. Are Floyd and I watching the same show?
Monday night’s Dancing with the Stars Performance Show will be followed by the premiere of Samantha Who?, which I’m excited about because of its connections with Star Trek: Voyager. Tuvok has a recurring role of the show, and the pilot was directed by Lt. Tom Paris.
PopMatters has an extensive list of the best TV shows on DVD, which rightly mentions the Danish series The Kingdom — progenitor of the failed American series Kingdom Hospital — as one of the best examples of TV surrealism.
People’s backstage report from the Dancing with the Stars Results Show details some of the audience-performer interaction at the taping. Tom Bergeron saved his best lactation humor for the TV Guide backstage report.
Melanie Brown and Maksim Chmerkovskiy are heading to the U.K. so that she can film a video with the Spice Girls. Maks has a plan for what he’ll be doing during his down time: "David Beckham and I are going to get coffee while they’re shooting."
Last night’s DwtS Results Show was watched by 16 million people, while Cavemen dropped 20% of its audience from last week.
One of my favorite new shows, Gossip Girl, became the first new show of the season to get picked up for a full season.
Classy, toothless Jonny Fairplay is suing Danny Bonaduce and everyone involved with the Fox Reality Awards for, among other things, "negligent supervision."
Speaking of classy things, I feel compelled to post this video of the worst song in the world (written and performed by the band Complete). And I’m not exaggerating. Never has a song so stupid in concept been performed so poorly. Be forewarned that, if you’re at work, your hysterical laughter may disrupt nearby coworkers.
It was time for Wayne to hang up his dancing shoes, and Cheryl couldn’t have looked happier.
Drew Lachey started this Dancing with the Stars Results Show with some sad news: he’ll be replaced by Samantha Harris next week. You’ll be missed, Drew.
Then, the judges awarded their encore to Jennie & Derek for their gutsy Tango. It was a nice way to acknowledge Jennie’s triumph over her own self-doubt, even if the couple didn’t earn the judges’ highest scores.
Just to allow them to relax after having tough weeks, Jane & Tony and Jennie & Derek were told they were safe, as the show went to its first commercial break.
The show returned with the evening’s first performance. Seal sang his hit, "Kiss From a Rose," accompanied by professional pair Eddie Stutts & Valentina Weiss. The dancing was beautiful.
After that, it was time to hear what last night’s studio audience thought of the performances. Season 3 contestant Monique Coleman is enjoying this season’s girl power. Jerry O’Connell-Romijn-Stamos said, "When you’re international television stars like Fred [his Carpoolers costar] and myself, you have front row seats to this. And you could see in Jennie’s eyes, this girl was a girl on a mission."
Welcome to my world, Jerry.
Marie & Jonathan and Melanie & Maksim were then told that they were safe, too.
Drew then tried to interview Jennie & Derek and Helio & Julianne backstage, but soon gave up, as the rest of the cast tried to egg the Hough siblings into a fight.
The evening’s second performance was by Billy Ray Cyrus and his daughter, Miley. I was impressed with Miley, whose voice sounds a little like a young Dolly Parton. Maks & Karina danced during the song, executing some impressive lifts and tricks.
There was time for one more musical performance. Seal sang his new song, "Amazing," which, for me, fell a little short of its name. Four anonymous dancers dressed as Annie Lennox in the video for "Sweet Dreams" didn’t make the performance any better.
Following the performance, an interesting segment shed light on the DwtS band’s role on the show. Music Director Harold Wheeler gets the next week’s music immediately after the Results Show ends — at the same time as the dancing couples. The band has one week to learn all of those songs, plus anything they’ll be playing at the Results Show.
The first time they practice with the dancers is at the dress rehearsal, and then they only get ten minutes with each couple to correct any tempo issues. Wayne said that, of all the bands he’s worked with in his career, Wheeler’s "is truly the best there is."
After that segment, Tom threw things to the "lame duck fill-in host," who was backstage with Cameron, Mark, Wayne, and Helio." Drew replied, "Thank you, Father Time, for that wonderful throw." As the guys yelled, "Aw, snap!" Tom ran backstage, snuck up behind Drew and yelled, "I heard that!"
A second clip package followed, highlighting some of the ways the pros help their celebrities during their live performances. When Cameron’s chin drops, Edyta raises her own chin. Julianne opens her eyes wide if Helio’s slouching. And Cheryl always puts herself between Wayne and the judges for the difficult parts of their routines.
Finally, the last of the safe couples were announced: Sabrina & Mark, Cameron & Edyta, Helio & Julianne, and Mark & Kym. That left Wayne & Cheryl at the bottom, with Floyd & Karina.
Unlike most of the ousted pros, Cheryl was all smiles when she and Wayne were told their dancing days were over. Wayne, for his part, was disappointed he wouldn’t get to dance the Paso Doble next week — although it would’ve been his bad luck to be assigned the ridiculously fast Viennese Waltz.
Instead, Wayne & Cheryl had one last dance to the overused Daniel Powter anti-anthem, "Bad Day."
TV Guide’s backstage report from last night’s Dancing with the Stars Performance Show chronicles the injuries of the show’s participants. And in People’s behind-the-scenes report, Cameron Mathison talks about what it’s like to dance with Edyta in front of his two wives: the real one and the TV one.
Jennie Garth posted in her blog this morning that she was happy with her Tango last night. But Len Goodman might retroactively dock her points once he finds out that Jennie twice referred to him as "Glen" in her post.
Variety has another article about the looming writers’ strike, detailing exactly how it would affect Hollywood. If the writers do strike in November, low performing new shows could be canceled outright. A January writers’ strike would see new episodes run out in February. Either way, studios have already started preparing for the worst.
How will networks fill their time slots in the event of a strike? More reality and game shows.
It was Ladies’ Night again on Dancing with the Stars, as the women dominated the dance floor.
Sabrina Bryan & Mark Ballas — Jive
Sabrina made high kicks in high heels look easy. Mark’s choreography was youthful, but sophisticated — even if he did do the Worm. He’s wisely recognized that Sabrina can pull off difficult moves, and he definitely pushes her.
Len said, "For me, that was your best dance so far." Bruno told Sabrina, "You’re like a seismic event. You get aftershocks after your performance." Carrie Ann agreed: "This dance completely suits you. It’s youthful. It’s vibrant. It’s all you."
Cameron Mathison & Edyta Sliwinska — Tango
It’s hard to be sexy while dancing to Sonny & Cher’s "The Beat Goes On." But Cameron owned the dance in a way that he hasn’t so far. Looking confident is almost as important as nailing the moves, and Cameron did both.
Carrie Ann called their Tango "G-rated," but said, "I definitely saw an improvement." Len told a You have got great posture and you’ve got a great hold. For me, it lacked a character of the Tango." But Bruno called him a "lady-killer."
Mark Cuban & Kym Johnson — Jive
Mark’s hip was in a ton of pain, and it was obvious in his performance. Kym gave Mark’s hip a break by having him do the Twist for measures at a time, which gave the whole routine a slow feel. Then Mark lost his timing early into the performance. It’s obvious that he’s trying very hard, but this wasn’t Mark’s dance.
Bruno told Mark, "You were more in control. You were cleaner. Your started well, but you lost it." Carrie Ann said, "You get a little…almost like your kind of imitating somebody dancing. You’re the one dancing. Full out! Believe it a little more." Len complimented Kym for doing "a great job with the choreography," and told Mark, "I can see a development."
Jennie Garth & Derek Hough — Tango
Last week’s slip was the best thing that could have happened to Jennie. She lost all of her hesitancy this week, embracing the dramatic character of the dance. And Derek didn’t let Jennie off the hook by choreographing a safe routine; she executed some powerful kicks and a gorgeous leg sweep. After their performance, Jennie jumped for joy.
Len said the performance was "sharp and tangy like a pickle." Carrie Ann gave Jennie a standing ovation and a high five. Bruno told Jennie, "You took on this tango and you won. You should be so proud. Don’t cry for me, Argentina."
Melanie Brown & Maksim Chmerkovskiy — Jive
Maks showed off by wearing an open vest with no shirt. But he didn’t do any moves that would outshine Mel: a problem he’s had with his previous partners. Mel’s great synchronization and timing allowed her to hold her own with Maks, and she executed a cool split moves and some complicated-looking turns. She and Sabrina had the best Jives of the night.
Bruno called Melanie "the bouncing bombshell. Excitement on legs." Len agreed that Mel B’s "B is for Bounce. That was your best dance." Carrie Ann just said, "All of the things they said, I agree with."
As they waited for their scores backstage, Drew told Maks, "The stage managers wanted me to tell you they’re looking for your shirt," which was all the invitation Maks needed to take off his vest and show off his glittery suspenders.
Wayne Newton & Cheryl Burke — Tango
Cheryl tried to get Wayne to focus on his strong point: performance. Wayne took the floor wearing a funny fake moustache and ponytail, but then gave a serious performance. Cheryl had to dance around Wayne, who barely moved at all.
Carrie Ann said, "It felt, at times, that Cheryl was leading you." Bruno called Wayne’s look "something between Errol Flynn and Captain Hook, even Steven Seagal in between." Len said, "The mood of it was great. Unfortunately, you spent so much time on the character the dance somehow disappeared."
Drew asked Cheryl backstage what viewers could expect to see Wayne dressed as next week, should they get enough votes to continue. Cheryl’s response was a farewell speech (or cry for mercy): "Well, not only is Wayne a great dancer or a great entertainer, but he’s a great guy. I’ve enjoyed working with him this season. It’s been a pleasure."
Floyd Mayweather & Karina Smirnoff — Jive
Floyd started the routine by jumping rope, dropping the jumprope near the stage where it lay as a tripping hazard. Indeed, at the end of the routine, Karina snagged the rope on her shoe. Floyd’s arms were all over the place during the performance, and his pelvic thrusts were, um, overly enthusiastic. However, his footwork was better.
Len was concerned that Floyd has been training in gym shoes: "I think you should practice more in the proper dance shoes so you get used to pointing your toes." Carrie Ann appreciated Floyd’s energy, but said, "You’ve gotta work on the structure of the dance. Just a little more detail please." Bruno told Floyd, "You can do anything you want, you really can. Just, please, do it."
Jane Seymour & Tony Dovolani — Tango
Jane looked as stylish as ever in her beautiful dress. She had no trouble keeping in character, giving a dramatic performance that ended with an equally dramatic finishing move.
Bruno enthused, "Drama. Pathos. Passion. Great technique." Len: "You came out haughty, proud. I’ll tell you what — that could’ve been on pay-per-view." A teary Carrie Ann said, "That was just beautiful to see you put your heart and soul and transform your emotions into one of the most gorgeous dances I’ve seen. Every moment was a beautiful picture."
Helio Castroneves & Julianne Hough — Jive
Julianne looked like disco Pocahontas in this very youthful routine. Helio gave another great performance, culminating in a slide across the floor that ripped a hole in the knees of his pants. Julianne helped him limp over to the judges’ table for their remarks.
Carrie Ann told Helio, "Your fun is contagious." Bruno said, "Technically you were not as clean as precise as you usually are." Len agreed: "you messed up a bit on these kick-ball-changes. But as always, you come out, turn it on. Well done."
Drew applauded Helio backstage, "I see you trying to work the sympathy vote with the little limp off stage. Well played, well played."
Marie Osmond & Jonathan Roberts — Tango
In past seasons, men have had the market cornered on humorous routines. This season, Marie is the comedian, and she’s terrific at it. She’s getting the steps down, and Jonathan is capitalizing on Marie’s charm to great effect.
Len said, "Marvelous musical interpretation. You’ve gotta lift your ribcage a little more when you dance." Marie gasped in reply, "Too many babies!" Carrie Ann told Marie, "You brought Lucille Ball to the dance floor." Bruno said, "It could’ve become a bit of slapstick. It never did. The Meryl Streep of dance."
Leaderboard: 27 — Sabrina & Mark, Melanie & Maksim, Jane & Tony 26 — Jennie & Derek, Marie & Jonathan 24 — Helio & Julianne 23 — Cameron & Edyta 21 — Floyd & Karina 20 — Mark & Kym 18 — Wayne & Cheryl
Sabrina and Melanie performed my favorite Jives of the night, and Jennie gave my favorite Tango. Just to make sure they’re safe, I might have to throw votes to Cameron, Helio, Marie, and Jane.
The three lowest scoring couples are all fair game tomorrow night, but Mark & Kym and Wayne & Cheryl seem the most likely to wind up in the Bottom Two. I’m hoping that it’s Wayne & Cheryl’s turn to head home, as Wayne doesn’t seem to have any room for improvement and Cheryl seems to want out.
Tonight could be rough for several of the contestants on Dancing with the Stars. Mark Cuban is concerned, because he’s physically not up to performing the Jive as a result of his hip replacement, and many of his fans are going to be watching the Dallas Cowboys on Monday Night Football.
Even two-time champ Cheryl Burke sounds a little nervous, after her first trip to the Bottom Two with Wayne Newton: "We are trying our best, taking baby steps, and then we’ll be ready to go for the giant leaps with our Tango on Monday night."
Kudos to Sabrina Bryan for helping one of her fellow contestants: "We were set to do the Tango, but when things happened with Jane Seymour and her mom passing away, we were asked if we would switch and do the Jive, and let Jane do the Tango. I’m sure with the amount of time she’s going to have, trying to do some fast, upbeat routine was not going be in her ozone layer, you know? Anything to help her make it through this week and come back — we were actually really happy to help out."
For an extra dose of Dancing this week, check out I Wanna Be a Soap Star on Tuesday night, hosted by Cameron Mathison. Karina Smirnoff drops by the show to teach contestants some ballroom moves, with a little help from Carrie Ann Inaba’s boyfriend, So You Think You Can Dance’s Artem Chigvintsev.
And fears of a Hollywood writers’ strike rose as talks between the studios and writers broke down over the weekend. A similar strike in 1988 lasted for 22 weeks and cost the TV industry $500 million.
Fei Long’s winning streak came to an end, and Sister Christian took the fall.
Christian-radio host Leslie started the episode confident in her position in the Fei Long tribe. After all, there’s no way she could be more annoying than pervy Jean-Robert, who rubs up against the younger women every night. "If we ever have to go to Tribal Council," she said, "at least we don’t have to worry about who it’ll be first."
The Reward Challenge gave Fei Long their first clue that Tribal Council might be in their future. In a floating version of the game King of the Hill, the contestants were divided by gender and had to force their opponents off a pier. The first team to win three rounds won the challenge.
Human action figure James had no trouble tossing the men of Zhan Hu into the water in the two rounds of men’s competition. But the women of Fei Long were no match for Jamie, Peih-Gee, and Sherea. And, since the women had gone first, Zhan Hu earned their first victory. They won some cushy blankets and pillows, and then nabbed Leslie as their kidnap victim.
At Zhan Hu camp, Leslie gave the next Hidden Immunity Idol clue to Jaime (who’d done the same for Leslie, last week). Then the gals spent the rest of the day swimmin’ and talkin’ Jesus with Erik, Peih-Gee, and Sherea.
Meanwhile, at Fei Long’s camp, Todd and Courtney overheard Jean-Robert and James hatching plans to get rid of Courtney and Leslie. James was only interested in eliminating Leslie, but Todd and Courtney considered him guilty by association, and they vowed to exact their revenge on him and Jean-Robert.
Later, Leslie returned to the Fei Long camp, gabbing that she’d met some fellow Christians at Zhan Hu. Aaron feared that Leslie had formed a Holy Alliance with members of the other tribe, and he decided to get rid of her in the event of a Fei Long loss at the Immunity Challenge.
Good thing Aaron was prepared.
In the challenge, four team members had to individually chop through a series of ropes to free some puzzle pieces, and then the last two members of the tribe would assemble the puzzle.
Courtney was the first member up for the Fei Long tribe. The easiest way to cut the ropes was by swinging the machete like you’d swing an axe to cut down a tree. But skinny Courtney could hardly even lift the machete. She’d previously joked, "I only weigh seven pounds," and not an ounce of that is muscle.
By the time Courtney finished — eventually sawing through her ropes — all four of the members of Zhan Hu had finished chopping, and Dave and Sherea were assembling their puzzle. The rest of the members of Fei Long made quick work of their ropes, but there was just no way to rebound from such a time deficit.
Courtney was pretty sure she’d be voted out after her poor performance in the challenge, but she and Leslie united to vote for Jean-Robert, if only to send him a warning about his loutish behavior.
Little did Courtney know that Aaron was pressuring teammates to off Leslie. Aaron made a convincing argument that Leslie was at least as weak as Courtney, and even more likely to switch teams than self-interested Jean-Robert. Plus, Jean-Robert was a valuable asset at challenges.
The 6-2 results of the vote at Tribal Council were a surprise to Leslie, who decided to frame her eviction as part of a Divine plan — and not simply the results of her teammates finding her untrustworthy.
Leslie’s post-show interview with TV Guide can be found here.
My Ox Is Broken 