Mel B survived a scary trip to the Bottom Two, and Floyd went down for the count on this week’s Dancing with the Stars Results Show.

Len Goodman started the show with a warning: "No lifts from now on." Then he awarded the judges’ encore to Cameron & Edyta because it was a "breakthrough" performance for them.

After Gloria Estefan’s last minute withdrawal from the show to be with her sick mother, the producers had to scramble to find replacement performers. The DwtS house band and singers did a fine job performing Estefan’s "Rhythm Is Gonna Get You," and DwtS pros Tony Dovolani, Elena Grinenko, Anna Trebunskaya, and Maksim Chmerkovskiy danced.

Following the performance, last night’s studio audience offered their opinions on the lift controversy. One female audience member suggested, "Someone didn’t get romance last night, and that was Carrie Ann." Former DwtS pro Ashly Del Grosso had floorside seats, and she agreed with Carrie Ann’s judgment: "I did see a lot of those lifts, and that is in the rules that you can’t do it."

Then the first two safe couples were announced: Sabrina & Mark and Cameron & Edyta. They’ll be around to watch next week’s special Results Show musical guest, Jennifer Lopez.

In a rare, slightly humorous Jimmy Kimmel segment, he and his parking lot attendant Guillermo looked into the dancers’ habit of spray tanning. As Melanie Brown walked out of the tanning room, Guillermo muttered, "Wow, she’s really tan." The several quizzical looks Mel gave in response made the scene work.

After that, Wade Robson took the floor for the best performance of the evening. Wade served as ringmaster in a creepy circus. The routine was very cool, and it was neat to see Wade doing all of the wacky moves he usually makes the dancers on So You Think You Can Dance do.

That dynamic routine was followed by the other fill-in performance of the evening. Drew Lachey & Cheryl Burke gave a lovely dance to Wayne Newton’s "Danke Schoen." If I hadn’t read the news about Gloria Estefan, I wouldn’t have known this week’s performances had been arranged at the last minute.

In a video package, Robin Roberts and Diane Sawyer, Reverend Run and Russell Simmons, and Joan and Melissa Rivers offered their opinions on what makes a good partnership. According to everyone, trust is always a key.

Then, Mark & Kym were announced as safe, while Floyd & Karina became the first couple sent to the Bottom Two.

Before the fates of the remaining couples were revealed, the celebrities discussed their greatest fears in a video clip package. Marie described the difference between singing and dancing onstage: "I know how to fix it if I make a mistake when I sing. I don’t know how to do that with my feet."

Cameron’s constantly afraid of dropping Edyta, and Sabrina worries about tripping down the stairs when they’re introduced. Jennie says falling was her biggest fear, but she learned from her fall in Week 3 that "even if my worst fear came true, I could move forward."

Jennie & Derek and Helio & Julianne were then told they were safe, leaving Marie & Jonathan, Mel & Maks, and Jane & Tony to worry a bit longer. Ultimately, Mel & Maks were told that they’d landed in the Bottom Two with Floyd.

The judges were stunned by the results. Bruno gave a candid answer when asked who should stay and who should go: "Melanie is the best dancer. There’s no question. C’mon, people. It’s insane."

Floyd & Karina were told to hit the bricks, and Floyd thanked all of his fans and everyone behind the scenes at DwtS. Karina said she enjoyed working with Floyd: "I got to know the real you."

The couple danced their last dance to Supertramp’s "Take the Long Way Home."

Gloria Estefan had to cancel her performance at tonight’s Dancing with the Stars Results Show to be with her ailing mother. ABC hasn’t named a replacement act yet, and it’s unclear how that will affect the "former contestant and former champion" that were scheduled to perform with Glo. I have a hunch that the champ is Cheryl Burke and the contestant is Ian Ziering.

TV Guide talked with the celebs about their radical physical transformations after last night’s DwtS Performance Show. And the writer was lucky enough to catch a glimpse of Edyta eating corn chips in her bathrobe after the show wrapped.

Dancing with the Stars is TV Guide’s cover story this week.

People has an outlet for all the DwtS fans disappointed by the end of Drew Lachey’s tenure as co-host: take their Drew vs. Samantha poll.

Reality Blurred is following all of the Top Chef 4 spoilers coming out of Chicago.

I’m excited for celebrity week on Wheel of Fortune, which airs November 12-16. With Paula Deen spinning the wheel for me, there’s no way I could lose.

Yahoo! TV features an article about the art of casting television shows.

And clips from the pilot of zombie drama Babylon Fields have surfaced. I’m disappointed Babylon Fields wasn’t picked up, but after seeing these clips, I’m not surprised CBS decided to pass on a show featuring zombie sex.

On this week’s Dancing with the Stars Performance Show, the season’s first perfect score was lost amid a lifting controversy.

Samantha Harris was back, and looking slim as ever. You’d never know she gave birth less than a month ago. Mercifully, she made it through her return without any major slip-ups.

Mark Cuban & Kym Johnson — Viennese Waltz
I think the song "Mr. Bojangles" is creepy, so maybe that colored my feelings about this performance. Or maybe it was Mark’s weird softshoe break early in the routine, as if he was channeling Joey Lawrence. The performance wasn’t great, but it’s the best that Mark’s done so far.

Len agreed with me, telling Mark is was his "best dance." Bruno said the routine "started very well," before Mark turned into "Bigfoot in a suit." Carrie Ann, who’d criticized Mark before for singing along with the music, said, "I’m very proud of you. The mouth was not moving."

Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…7, Len…8, Bruno…7 = 22/30

Sabrina Bryan & Mark Ballas — Paso Doble
The DwtS Band’s remixed version of Dead or Alive’s "You Spin Me Round" didn’t work, but Sabrina & Mark managed to distract with some stellar dancing. Sabrina not only executed the moves, but she stayed in character. And the Paso gave Mark a chance to show off.

Bruno gushed, "Power, attack, stealth…a little lynx on the prowl." Carrie Ann said, "I get the sense that you want this really bad. I thought that was perfection." Len agreed: "I’m always looking for things I can find wrong with you, and tonight, I couldn’t find any."

Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…10, Len…10, Bruno…10 = 30/30

Jane Seymour & Tony Dovolani — Viennese Waltz
Jane looked like a princess, giving a very lovely performance with speedy turns. If Mark Cuban got an 8 for his Waltz, then Jane deserved an 11.

Jane & Tony were the first couple that Carrie Ann called out for executing a lift, which she defined as a move that could not be executed by one person alone in which both feet leave the floor at the same time. "We do have a rule about lifts," Carrie Ann said, "and you guys pushed it." Tony proceeded to argue with Carrie Ann about whether Jane’s feet both left the floor, and it was uncomfortable to watch.

Len declared tonight "a lift free zone" — or more accurately a "free lift zone" — and promised not to penalize any of the couples for questionable moves. He said Jane & Tony’s dance had "all the romance of old Vienna." Bruno told Jane she looked like "the queen of the fairies."

Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…8, Len…9, Bruno…9 = 26/30

Floyd Mayweather & Karina Smirnoff — Paso Doble
Unlike Sabrina, Floyd hasn’t been able to shed his hip-hop tendencies, stomping into the floor with too much force even for the aggressive Paso. When he wasn’t stomping, he danced on tiptoes. The performance ended with Floyd swinging a limp Karina around in an ugly lift that made it look as though she were unconscious.

Len said, "Bloody good job." Bruno said Floyd "went from a bulldozer to a bull fighter." Carrie Ann asked, "Was that a lift?" but continued, "That was the most improvement I’ve seen from you."

Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…7, Len…8, Bruno…8 = 23/30

Melanie Brown & Maksim Chmerkovskiy — Viennese Waltz
Mel & Maks gave a pretty, dramatic performance that felt too brief. Mel’s arm extensions were very nice, although she didn’t look completely at ease with the exaggerated neck posture of the Viennese Waltz.

Bruno said, "Melanie, sweet dreams are made of this. I was swept away to Wonderland." Carrie Ann said, "You bring together this sensual elegance. Your shoulders were just a hair up." Len said, "Well, done to you, Maks," and then to Melanie, "You’re a revelation."

Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…8, Len…9, Bruno…9 = 26/30

Cameron Mathison & Edyta Sliwinska — Paso Doble
Edyta had trouble choreographing a routine to the Superman theme song, and who can blame her? But Cameron attacked the dance enthusiastically. The performance ended in a very cool pose, and their superhero outfits were great.

Carrie Ann asked, "Cameron? Who are you? That was incredible!" She then scolded them for being the latest couple to execute a lift. Len told Cameron, "You and Paso Doble go together like fish and chips." Bruno said, "You took it like a hero. Well done."

Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…9, Len…9, Bruno…9 = 27/30

Marie Osmond & Jonathan Roberts — Viennese Waltz
The tempo of Elvis Presley’s "Can’t Help Falling in Love" made a Viennese Waltz challenging, and Jonathan compensated by creating a routine that was a little more casual and less elegant than some of the other Waltzes. More distracting than the song were Marie’s weird head whips that Carrie Ann described as "stripperish."

Len told Marie, "You put the feel-good factor into every dance." Bruno said, "For me it was a bit like Sleeping Beauty, but still asleep." Carrie Ann said, "I actually thought it was a nice choice. I like the new-found tenderness."

Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…9, Len…9, Bruno…8 = 26/30

Jennie Garth & Derek Hough — Paso Doble
Jennie & Derek’s dance was fast and fun, and full of character. Ian Ziering gave it a standing ovation, and I would have, too.

Bruno said, "You’ve improved so much, and you’re getting better every week. The choreography was superb." Carrie Ann told Jennie, "You dug deep this week," although she said she would take a point off for — wait for it — their lift. Len started his comments by saying, "I am a grumpy old devil, and if I do start to see lifts creeping in, I can be far worse than these two." Then he turned to Jennie and said, "Listen to Lennie: That… bloomin’ fantastic."

Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…8, Len…10, Bruno…9 = 27/30

Helio Castroneves & Julianne Hough — Viennese Waltz
Helio can’t stop smiling long enough to create a serious character. The performance was very good, but it didn’t seem to come as naturally for Helio as some of his previous dances. Julianne learned from the other couples’ experience and was careful to drag her toe in what was very close to being yet another lift.

Carrie Ann said, "Julianne, thank you for keeping your toes on the ground. Helio, you know, when you dance, you make me happy to be alive." Len said, "I loved it." Bruno said, "You really are the glittering combo. You’re like sunlight: you can never have enough." Bruno should be expecting a call from the Skin Cancer Foundation sometime soon.

Judges’ Scores: Carrie Ann…9, Len…9, Bruno…9 = 27/30

As Tom cued a recap of tonight’s performances, he scooped up some of the feathers shed from Julianne’s dress and said, "It’s a shame Julianne’s only 19; she’s already molting."

Leaderboard:
30 — Sabrina & Mark
27 — Cameron & Edyta, Jennie & Derek, Helio & Julianne
26 — Jane & Tony, Mel & Maks, Marie & Jonathan
23 — Floyd & Karina
22 — Mark & Kym

Sabrina & Mark were the best couple of the night, but I’d have to rank Jennie & Derek a close second for sheer entertainment value. Both couples will be sharing my votes (with one vote thrown to Helio & Julianne for giving the night’s best Viennese Waltz).

The judges’ leaderboard reveals one truth they can’t deny, no matter how nice they are in their comments: Mark and Floyd aren’t in the same league as the other celebrities. Expect to see them in tomorrow night’s Bottom Two.

Samantha Harris returns to her Dancing with the Stars hosting duties tonight, and Reality Blurred’s Andy Denhart (writing for MSNBC) paid tribute to her ineptitude and the unintentional hilarity that ensues.

Sabrina Bryan and Jennie Garth have spent the weekend preparing for the Paso Doble, while Mark Cuban tried to get his brain and body in sync for the Viennese Waltz. Jennie also warned 90210 fans to look for Ian Ziering in the studio audience tonight.

Jane Seymour, meanwhile, wrote about her experience training for DwtS while coping with her mother’s death.

Tuesday night’s DwtS Results Show will feature two performances by Gloria Estefan. Some of the DwtS pros will dance as Glo sings "Rhythm Is Gonna Get You," and she will be accompanied by her own backup dancers as she sings "A Bailar" from her new album. So You Think You Can Dance choreographer Wade Robson is the night’s featured guest dancer.

A trailer has been released for the upcoming Dancing with the Stars video game. I’m still not sure what I think about it.

Fox has reduced its order for episodes of The Return of Jezebel James to seven — not surprising considering the terrible promotional clips that surfaced a few months ago.

Seeing as today is Blog Action Day, where bloggers try to draw attention to environmental issues, here’s a link to an article I read at MSN yesterday about American toy companies. For those of us in the U.S., buying American-made toys produces fewer greenhouse gases during transportation and eliminates the risk of kids being exposed to the lead paint used in many Chinese-made toys.

The previous season’s Bachelor, Lt. Andy Baldwin, deploys to Iraq in January. His rep says the deployment factored in when Baldwin broke up with on-air love Tessa Horst. If nothing else, "I’m heading to Iraq" sounds more believable than, "It’s not you; It’s me."

The American Idol Tour has been fined $5000 for violating New York child labor laws — yet another problem that can be attributed to Sanjaya.

Fox is trying to boost the credibility of its sitcoms by adding the old "taped in front of a live studio audience" tag at the start of each episode.

New episodes of Tim Gunn’s Guide to Style, which was supposed to fill the gap between seasons of Top Chef and Project Runway, have been pulled until PR returns, so that Gunn’s bland show can get its own makeover.

Simon Pegg has just been added to the cast of the upcoming Star Trek movie in the role of Scotty. Pegg is the man behind zombie cult hit Shaun of the Dead and buddy cop comedy Hot Fuzz, which might be the funniest movie I’ve ever seen.

On this week’s Survivor: China, Dave learned the hard way that you can only be a leader when people want to follow you.

Winning their first Immunity Challenge hadn’t done much to change the mood at Zhan Hu’s camp. Sherea became the mouthpiece of the tribe, which was frustrated with Dave’s bossy style of leadership. After he criticized her method of separating moldy rice from the non-moldy rice in their container, she let him have it.

The feud was interrupted by a nighttime Reward Challenge. Using giant chopsticks, two teammates had to carry a flaming metal ball to a wok. Once inside the wok, the ball ignited some fireworks, which probably scared the crap out of the monkeys and pandas living in the forest.

The first team to light all three of their woks won fishing and cooking lessons from a local family the following morning. And one lucky member of the losing tribe would be kidnapped and benefit from the morning’s feast as well.

Both teams struggled to wield the awkward wooden poles, but Fei Long was victorious in the end. They kidnapped Dave — and quickly realized how annoying he was. Dave repeatedly hugged everyone, for any reason. When he found out Courtney was from New York, Dave sang, "I love that Plaaace!" and hugged Courtney, shattering her frail skeleton and killing her instantly.

Gravedigger James politely asked Dave not to hug him. But Todd gritted his teeth and palled around with Dave, who rewarded Todd’s tolerance with a clue to the hidden Immunity Idol.

The next morning, a fisherman, his wife, and kids arrived at camp. Out of nowhere, Jean-Robert began speaking Mandarin with the family. Todd gushed, "It was FANTASTIC!" Jean-Robert translated the wife’s directions while most of the tribe helped prepare the meal.

Meanwhile, Aaron and Denise were out on the lake learning fishing techniques. The fisherman tied a cord around the necks of his pet water birds and sent them into the lake to catch fish. Since the cord prevented the cormorants from swallowing the fish, the fisherman directed the birds to spit the fish out into the boat.

Now all Aaron and Denise need to do is catch and train some of their own birds. Or they could just use the net they’d already won at an earlier Reward Challenge.

They headed back to shore to chow down. The meal looked scrumptious, even to a well-fed vegetarian like me. As mulleted Boston lunchlady Denise put it, "Flavor has never tasted so good! …That was the delicate-est thing I have ever put in my mouth."

Over at the Zhan Hu camp, the atmosphere was much more relaxed without Dave around. But it also took an extraordinary amount of willpower for the tribe to get up and feed themselves.

Sherea decided she could best contribute to the team by conserving her energy for challenges (i.e., laying in the shelter and letting everyone else do all the work). "I’m gonna ride the work horse ’til the tail come off," she said, "because I’m not doing anything ’til I have to."

Sherea’s conservation efforts were put to the test at the next Immunity Challenge.

Two teammates at a time donned traditional Chinese armor and threw three sets of meteor hammers (three rocks connected by a rope) across an outdoor arena and past a pair of opponents, attempting to shatter porcelain vases. Meanwhile, the opposing pair was trying to do the same, only in the opposite direction. After three rounds of battle (two men, two women, and co-ed), the team that had broken the most vases would be declared winner.

While Sherea’s vast energy reserves allowed her to smash one of her opponents vases, Jaime was able to break two even after having helped at camp. And their efforts still couldn’t defeat Fei Long.

Peih-Gee, Frosti, Erik, and Jaime had to decide whether to eliminate pushy Dave or listless Sherea. Despite a last ditch PR effort by Dave, the tribe decided enough was enough and cut him loose. Dave tried to explain his downfall: "I gave it my all. Perhaps I gave it too much."

Next time, Erik and Jamie form a love connection, and Survivor: China has its first "big twist."

The networks have started placing orders for additional episodes of some of their new dramas, including Bionic Woman, Life, and Cane, among others.

People filed another report of Floyd Mayweather, Jr.’s negative comments about the DwtS judges, evidently hoping that it will become a full-fledged controversy. Floyd says he thinks his Jive deserved a 25 or 26 — a score which would’ve placed him above Helio on the leaderboard. Are Floyd and I watching the same show?

Monday night’s Dancing with the Stars Performance Show will be followed by the premiere of Samantha Who?, which I’m excited about because of its connections with Star Trek: Voyager. Tuvok has a recurring role of the show, and the pilot was directed by Lt. Tom Paris.

Chevy Chase’s stellar work impersonating Mel Gibson on Law & Order landed him a special appearance on Brothers & Sisters.

PopMatters has an extensive list of the best TV shows on DVD, which rightly mentions the Danish series The Kingdom — progenitor of the failed American series Kingdom Hospital — as one of the best examples of TV surrealism.

I’ll spend the rest of my day having Optimus Prime prank call my friends and family. Transformers, roll out!

People’s backstage report from the Dancing with the Stars Results Show details some of the audience-performer interaction at the taping. Tom Bergeron saved his best lactation humor for the TV Guide backstage report.

According to another People report from last night’s show, it took Floyd Mayweather, Jr. all of three weeks to become convinced that the judges are out to get him, as I predicted would happen before the season began.

Melanie Brown and Maksim Chmerkovskiy are heading to the U.K. so that she can film a video with the Spice Girls. Maks has a plan for what he’ll be doing during his down time: "David Beckham and I are going to get coffee while they’re shooting."

The Spice Girls are also the musical entertainment for this year’s televised Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show.

Last night’s DwtS Results Show was watched by 16 million people, while Cavemen dropped 20% of its audience from last week.

One of my favorite new shows, Gossip Girl, became the first new show of the season to get picked up for a full season.

Classy, toothless Jonny Fairplay is suing Danny Bonaduce and everyone involved with the Fox Reality Awards for, among other things, "negligent supervision."

Speaking of classy things, I feel compelled to post this video of the worst song in the world (written and performed by the band Complete). And I’m not exaggerating. Never has a song so stupid in concept been performed so poorly. Be forewarned that, if you’re at work, your hysterical laughter may disrupt nearby coworkers.

It was time for Wayne to hang up his dancing shoes, and Cheryl couldn’t have looked happier.

Drew Lachey started this Dancing with the Stars Results Show with some sad news: he’ll be replaced by Samantha Harris next week. You’ll be missed, Drew.

Then, the judges awarded their encore to Jennie & Derek for their gutsy Tango. It was a nice way to acknowledge Jennie’s triumph over her own self-doubt, even if the couple didn’t earn the judges’ highest scores.

Just to allow them to relax after having tough weeks, Jane & Tony and Jennie & Derek were told they were safe, as the show went to its first commercial break.

The show returned with the evening’s first performance. Seal sang his hit, "Kiss From a Rose," accompanied by professional pair Eddie Stutts & Valentina Weiss. The dancing was beautiful.

After that, it was time to hear what last night’s studio audience thought of the performances. Season 3 contestant Monique Coleman is enjoying this season’s girl power. Jerry O’Connell-Romijn-Stamos said, "When you’re international television stars like Fred [his Carpoolers costar] and myself, you have front row seats to this. And you could see in Jennie’s eyes, this girl was a girl on a mission."

Welcome to my world, Jerry.

Marie & Jonathan and Melanie & Maksim were then told that they were safe, too.

Drew then tried to interview Jennie & Derek and Helio & Julianne backstage, but soon gave up, as the rest of the cast tried to egg the Hough siblings into a fight.

The evening’s second performance was by Billy Ray Cyrus and his daughter, Miley. I was impressed with Miley, whose voice sounds a little like a young Dolly Parton. Maks & Karina danced during the song, executing some impressive lifts and tricks.

There was time for one more musical performance. Seal sang his new song, "Amazing," which, for me, fell a little short of its name. Four anonymous dancers dressed as Annie Lennox in the video for "Sweet Dreams" didn’t make the performance any better.

Following the performance, an interesting segment shed light on the DwtS band’s role on the show. Music Director Harold Wheeler gets the next week’s music immediately after the Results Show ends — at the same time as the dancing couples. The band has one week to learn all of those songs, plus anything they’ll be playing at the Results Show.

The first time they practice with the dancers is at the dress rehearsal, and then they only get ten minutes with each couple to correct any tempo issues. Wayne said that, of all the bands he’s worked with in his career, Wheeler’s "is truly the best there is."

After that segment, Tom threw things to the "lame duck fill-in host," who was backstage with Cameron, Mark, Wayne, and Helio." Drew replied, "Thank you, Father Time, for that wonderful throw." As the guys yelled, "Aw, snap!" Tom ran backstage, snuck up behind Drew and yelled, "I heard that!"

A second clip package followed, highlighting some of the ways the pros help their celebrities during their live performances. When Cameron’s chin drops, Edyta raises her own chin. Julianne opens her eyes wide if Helio’s slouching. And Cheryl always puts herself between Wayne and the judges for the difficult parts of their routines.

Finally, the last of the safe couples were announced: Sabrina & Mark, Cameron & Edyta, Helio & Julianne, and Mark & Kym. That left Wayne & Cheryl at the bottom, with Floyd & Karina.

Unlike most of the ousted pros, Cheryl was all smiles when she and Wayne were told their dancing days were over. Wayne, for his part, was disappointed he wouldn’t get to dance the Paso Doble next week — although it would’ve been his bad luck to be assigned the ridiculously fast Viennese Waltz.

Instead, Wayne & Cheryl had one last dance to the overused Daniel Powter anti-anthem, "Bad Day."

TV Guide’s backstage report from last night’s Dancing with the Stars Performance Show chronicles the injuries of the show’s participants. And in People’s behind-the-scenes report, Cameron Mathison talks about what it’s like to dance with Edyta in front of his two wives: the real one and the TV one.

Jennie Garth posted in her blog this morning that she was happy with her Tango last night. But Len Goodman might retroactively dock her points once he finds out that Jennie twice referred to him as "Glen" in her post.

In other DwtS news, Jennie’s husband Peter Facinelli sends her "racy" text messages during practice. And Cameron’s All My Children costars have lots of opinions on how he’s doing on DwtS.

Online betting on Survivor: China has been suspended, after cast and crew members were caught placing bets on the show’s outcome.

Yahoo! TV has a slide show of new TV shows already in danger of being canceled.

Variety has another article about the looming writers’ strike, detailing exactly how it would affect Hollywood. If the writers do strike in November, low performing new shows could be canceled outright. A January writers’ strike would see new episodes run out in February. Either way, studios have already started preparing for the worst.

How will networks fill their time slots in the event of a strike? More reality and game shows.